Devil on the Rooftop [Book 1]

Chapter 97 - Arisa -

I decided to meet up with Loyal after dinner. I wasn't sure if I could act like my ex-boyfriend hadn't just shown up to apologize about our past, but I had to try. I told mom I was going out for a walk in the neighbourhood and waited for Loyal on the next street over. It was the same curb where he found me freaking out about Khaleel's kiss. Loyal's text said he missed me and that he wanted to see me. It was very sweet and I felt the same way, but after everything that happened with the delinquent, I was starting to feel insecure about some things.

Loyal arrived a little after seven, curtesy of a black Lexus. I was surprised to see him still in his school uniform. "Were you at Jackheights this whole time?" I asked, after he waved the driver off.

Loyal brought me in for a close hug. He didn't say anything, he just quietly held me, and rubbed my back. I could hear the Lexus driving off. I had a lot of questions about it and whether or not the car was coming back to take him home.

"Is everything okay?" I asked instead.

"Now that I've seen you," Loyal said, taking a deep breath. "Everything is perfect."

I felt my heart pound. Not because of the sweet talk but because of the guilt. I had to tell him what was on my mind or it would eat me up inside. I didn't want to force anything or pretend that we were on the same page when we clearly weren't. "Listen," I said softly. "I think we should properly discuss what happened between me and Khaleel."

Loyal's hold on me tightened. "Do we have to?"

"You don't think we should?" I asked. "I mean, doesn't it bother you? It bothers me. I think about it all the time—not the kissing him back part, but the part where you said it wasn't my fault. The truth is, it was my fault. I should have pulled away from him but I didn't."

Loyal stepped back to turn away from me. It looked like he was thinking about it too. "Alright then, why didn't you stop it?" he asked.

"Because I got curious."

Loyal nodded before turning again to hold my attention. "And what would you like me to do with this information?"

I stared at him dumbfounded. "N-Nothing, it's just that—doesn't it bother you?"

"Of course it bothers me," he admitted. "But I'm trying to look past it and you're bringing it up as an issue that needs to be resolved."

"It does need to be resolved," I said assertively. "Not because of the kiss but because of what I've been feeling towards Khaleel."

Loyal was stone cold. "What have you been feeling? That you like him?"

I held my head. "I don't know if that's what it is. I just know that I've been brushing him off and acting like he's out of line for wanting me, but he isn't. I kissed him back. That would give anyone hope."

Loyal was quiet for a second.

"The truth really does hurt," he said.

"I'm sorry," I sighed. "I can't move forward with us without sorting this out, it's eating me alive. I'm nervous around the guy, I can't make eye-contact with him, and not to mention the fact that you're both not speaking to each other because of me."

"So, what are you planning to do?" he asked solemnly. "Apologize to him and then continue dating me? You don't think this new conversation will give him more hope?"

"What are you so afraid of?" I asked candidly.

Loyal stared at the ground. "I'm afraid you will change your mind about us. I'm afraid his hold on you will be stronger than your interest in me."

He was feeling insecure and that made sense but I couldn't drop this. I wasn't as confident as he was about the whole thing and I had to talk about it in order to get some answers. "Wade showed up to my house tonight," I said, wanting to be honest.

It was Loyal's turn to be dumbfounded. "What?" he snapped. "Why? What did he want? Did you tell him we were dating? What did he say?"

"Nothing," I drawled suspiciously. Okay, this was not the reaction I was expecting. He was acting really weird. It was similar to that time in the student council room, right after his sister said Wade's name. He lost his marbles that time too—what exactly was his deal with my ex-boyfriend?

"He wanted to apologize about what happened between us," I went on. "He did ask me out again, but it's not like I jumped at the chance to get back with him."

Loyal's eyes intensified. "Did you tell him we were dating or not?" he repeated, overlooking everything else I had just said.