The Life We Live

Chapter 12~ The plot

Zay's P.O.V.

"Ay lil bruh you good?" The homie Rilla asks me. I had been out of it thinking back to the conversation me and Ryan had on the way home last night.

"Yeah." I nod lying keeping to myself which wasn't normal for me. All the homies were having a good time laughing and I was just standing there out of it, instead of being in the mix. I knew Ryan was disappointed in me and I was disappointed in myself. •••••••

"You always think you know everything." Ryan's words from the night before played back in my head. "That's gon get you killed one day." He said coldly keeping his eyes on the road.

"Ra I Tho-" I began.

"It don't matter what you thought Nigga!" Ryan snapped cutting me off. "Thinking could get you killed it's about knowing." He shook his head gripping the steering wheel.

"I know I-" I began.

"You don't know shit!" Ryan screamed pounding his fist on the steering wheel. It was rare to see him mad, if he was mad you knew you fucked up. Either he cared about you or didn't give a fuck about you. It was either or and depending on where you stood would determine the consequence. "You never fucking listen that's your problem, don't say shit just listen. Cause if you knew so much nobody would have to tell you shit." He calmed down but his voice was still firm. I hated when he got mad at me, if he wasn't my big brother I woulda shot his ass I think to myself. He had me feeling like a little bitch and I hated that shit, but I knew better than to test him. We had got into plenty of fights and I learned the hard way. He always won most of them time and I could tell he wasn't going his full force, he had been in training longer than me. My father had put all his children in boxing and kickboxing classes. For some reason Ryan just was better than me just like my father was better than him. The oldest always kicked the one's under him ass.

"Now what if I woulda just let you fall through with your plan? Ain no telling where you'd b right now. Either dead or in jail, you move too sloppy and reckless. What you don't know is when you were just founding out who did the shooting I already had niggas outside of all they houses." Ryan admits to me and I think back to when ,Sav big bro, had said "it's done" I sat in awe feeling stupid. "And I ain have to tell you shit I just made it happen. You should be more Street smart than you are." Ryan shakes his head before parking the car in front of the house. He finally looks at me.

"You need to stop thinking you know everything , I know you want to be the top dog but that shit just doesn't happen over night it's work you have to put in.. and you DEFINITELY need to know how to move." He shakes his head for the thousandth time. "I want you to lay low for a minute bruh, this just showed me you ain't ready to be a front dog. You need to stay in the back and pay more attention. The loudest muhfucka in the room is the weakest. The person drawing all the attention is being observed and not the observer which makes you weak. If someone can be in you presence and you don't see them... that same person could be your killer and you would never see their face until it's too late." He looks at me to make sure I'm comprehending.

"I say all this to say your actions are the complete opposite. Your not a killer my Nigga you not even a hood Nigga in my eyes at this point. Nae more damn hood than you." He had a disgusted look on his face. "I don't know what it's going to take for you to understand the laws of these streets but until you do I want you under the radar, don't go making no moves don't even plan shit without me knowing. You have to consult with me first. Cause if something happens to you." Ryan stops and looks away from me and back outside the windshield with a death look on his face. "Go head bruh get out my face." He says unlocking the car door.

"Why you ain't tell me you had it under control?" I asked not being able to leave without that question being addressed.

"Because I wanted to see what you were capable of.. but I see I did it the right way by not getting you involved. And why the fuck you questioning me anyway? Get out my presence bruh." Ryan says dismissing me. I look at him one last time before getting out the car slamming the door behind me before walking up into the house. ••••