52.
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15,5k reads!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you insane?! I´m celebrating my life right now :D
This next part is dedicated to each one of my readers, who brought me this far!
I!LOVE!YOU!
Naya´s POV:
I´ve been walking up and down in Demi´s room with our little pumpkin in my arms. It´s not going to take long before she will wake up again and want milk. I can almost hear the ticking clock in my head, the minutes that pass faster than I want them to. Not because I don´t want her to wake up..it´s because I can´t find a solution for my problem how to feed Isabella. I don´t want to disappoint Demi and break our promise. She wanted to try how it goes with breastfeeding. I don´t want to give Isabella some fake milk. Not that I think it´s not good, but because I think that if I give her fake milk..I´m kind of letting Demi down. Like I´m giving up on her and the chance that she recovers. And I strongly believe that she´ll wake up..I mean she has to, hasn´t she?
Wilmer pops up in my mind. I wanted to text him a picture of Isabella. It´s his daughter and he has the right to know that she´s healthy and arrived the four days ago. Four days already.. But I don´t want to tell him what happened with Demi..I had my promise with him as well. I promised to take care of my girls and I kind of broke one part when I look at Demi... I just can´t call or text him right now..
I´m so torn apart between everyone and everything.
It´s a whole new feeling for me. I always knew what I wanted in life. What I was going to do next. What I wanted to be. Who I wanted to be with. I was the one that some girls envied over because I knew what steps I was going to take. There was always a road ahead of me with goals and stops that I already knew that they´d be there and where. I had my aims and my ambition. I was never so torn apart over decisions like the two I have to make.
It´s the most inappropriate moment for a song right now, but one comes up in my head and I think about singing it to calm me down. I walk down the room to Demi, sit down on her bed and grab her hand.
It´s more a whisper than a full voice that comes out of my mouth but it´s better this way, for me to have some more minutes to think about what I should do, without waking my mushroom sooner as I want to.
“Yes I do, I believe
That one day I will be, where I was
Right there, right next to you
In a ...the days just seem so dark
The moon, the stars, and nothing without you
Your touch, your skin, where do I begin?
No words can explain, the way I'm missing you
The night, this emptiness, this hole that I'm inside
These tears, they tell their own story”
I look down onto my baby and check if she´s still sleeping before I continue.
“You told me not to cry when you were gone
But the feeling's overwhelming, that's much too strong
Can I lay by your side, next to you, you
And make sure you're alright
I'll take care of you,
Now don't want to be here if I can't be with you tonight
I'm reaching out to you
Can you hear my call?
I used to say you won't hear me
This hurt that I've been through
I'm missing you, missing you like crazy, argh”
I can feel some fresh tears rolling down my cheeks and wipe them away, sniffing.
Isabella looks up at me with her big brown eyes as I finish crying and singing.
“Hey little girl”, I tap her nose playfully.
She´s not crying yet. I sigh. Maybe she was listening to me and kept calm, but I can feel her tense up and soon her cries fill the room and my problem needs a immediate solution. There´s one option I was too afraid to even think about it properly. It´s kind of weird and desperate..but I think that´s what I am. Desperate. I try to calm my squeaking girl, swallow hard and raise my hand towards Demi´s shirt. I´m disgusted by myself that I really am doing this as I start to unbutton her shirt and expose her left breast so that I can have a better hold onto Isabella. I look around to check if there´s any chance that someone comes in, but the hall, at least that what I can see of it seems to be empty. And that´s when I lay Isabella down and Isabella´s head next to Demi´s breast and pray that it works up. I close my eyes and am relieved as I start to hear her sucking. There must be milk in it. I hope Demi isn´t in pain right now. I take her numb arm and place it onto Isabella´s body.
I choke my tears down; “Baby? Can you ...can you feel this?”
I get no reaction.
“Demi, this is your little girl, Isabella. She has brown eyes, brown hair and your butt chin. Please open your eyes. You have to see your little miracle for yourself! She´s the most beautiful girl I´ve ever seen..beside you of course..”
Still no reaction.
“Demi, for fucks sake. Don´t leave me! I can´t do this without you. Please!”, I sob out, still holding my daughters head steady so that she can drink.
All I can hear is the silent sucking of my girl as I close my eyes and let my tears fall down. I don´t know for how long, but my baby has to be really hungry and I keep my eyes closed and try not to sob to hard and lose my grip on Isabella.
“...it tickles.”
What tickles?
Who said that?
I kind of stop breathing, open my eyes and look up.
RIGHT INTO DEMI´S
She is looking at me with tears in her eyes and then she looks down and lets them fall as well as she sees her daughter for the first time. She slightly moves her arms and holds her daughter alone as I remove my hand.
She is awake! I haven´t lost her! That´s the moment when I first push the emergency button and then low my head onto Demi´s legs, embrace them and break down crying.
Demi´s hand brushes through my hair and I hear her raspy voice again; “Don´t cry! This should be a good moment full of happiness”
I look up and see that she said that while she´s struggling with her own tears and crack into a smile. The biggest smile I could place onto my face and lean in to kiss her lips softly.
We just look at each other, now smiling and in silence. We don´t need anything to say. We just want to enjoy our moment before Dr. Baynes walks in and stops surprised as he sees Demi awake.
We can see him wipe away some tears as well before he speaks up; “Demi, I´m so glad you´re back. But please, you two, promise me now one thing. Take care of yourself. It must be gods will to rescue you over and over again. We´ll recover you and then I don´t want to see you for the next years, only for some check ups for Isabella, ok?”
We chuckle at his words and nod. We really manage to get from one problem into the next and could move into this hospital...
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Fate (Lesbian Story)
FanfictionDemi Lovato and Naya Rivera find themselves struggling to admit that they have feelings for each other, which complicates their relationship. Will they figure it out and become a couple or do they smother their feelings for each other? You'll find o...
