His First July

Chapter Nine

Don't worry, don't worry, I'm here by your side, by your side. We're letting go tonight.
Sia
(Burn the Pages)
                                    _His First July

Chapter Nine

  COLBY

Friendship.

A very important concept. I've seen movies where the main character has a close friend whose main purpose is to make sure the paths of the main character are on track, have their backs, or give advice of some sort. They're like the backbone of the lead, always there when they need a shoulder to cry on, when they need someone to laugh with, or to play video games and stay up till 3 in the morning binging episode after episode of Friends. 

Friendship was one of the reasons why my parents wanted me to attend highschool, they wanted me to make friends and experience the meaning of friendship. But, there's a very important detail they're missing. 

I don't really think I need friends because I've pretty much spent my whole life without a companion, I don't need anyone to direct my path, have my back, or give me advice, I don't need a friend to act as a backbone, cause I am my backbone, I don't need a shoulder to cry on cause I never cry, I don't need someone to laugh with, I'm pretty much happy to laugh with myself, that is, when I want to laugh... Besides, I can't really remember the last time I had a good laugh... Nothing’s actually funny to me anymore. As for video games, I actually love playing on my own... And the fact about staying up till 3, I'm not supposed to stay up past 1, so that's also ruled out.

Why would I need friends? 

With a pencil in between my lips, I furrowed my brows, studying my diagram of the organ systems of a lizard. There was an angle between the chest and stomach area that I wasn't really satisfied with. Absentmindedly, I pushed my glasses straight back to my eyes, my fingers brushing my hair back from their irritating spot above my eye lashes. 

I'm definitely getting a haircut, and I don't care what Mom has to say about it!

I sighed, my head lifting to check the time on the clock above the whiteboard. Few minutes left till lunch, Miss Stephon was busy typing away on her laptop as everyone else seemed to be huddled in small groups concentrating on their diagrams, or were they? 

I shook my head, about to refocus on my diagram when I froze, out of the corner of my eye, I spotted a particular group of four girls, resting their heads on their hands, all looking straight at me. 

I gingerly lowered my head, looking back at my paper as my mind began to wonder, were they looking at me? Or is there someone else behind me they're looking at? 

I took a quick glance behind me, to find a girl and two boys comparing their diagrams. 

I decided to look up at the girls direction again, to check if I'd been seeing things, but turns out I wasn't, their eyes were dead set on me. It was hard to miss the dazed dreamy look they had on. 

I took the pencil from between my lips, spinning it around my fingers and snapping it into place between my thumb and index. Wondering if that was why they were staring, but at that action, one of them sighed, shaking her head slowly, another one sent me a dreamy wave.