Unconditional (Book Two)

36. To Love You Again

Amelie's POV

It is about an hour and a half later that the doctor lastly takes me back to the room. In Los Angeles, it is mid-afternoon and there are light shades of gold caressing the floors of the hospital, gifted by the smile of the gleaming sun. Gifted; a gift, because as I laid in the MRI machine, embraced by its narrow curves and loud sounds, I realized how solely looking into the ocean hues of my husband's eyes was a gift—sharing a breath of air between two lungs.

Nevertheless, nothing will compare to the moment when I lastly carry my child. I know nothing about her so far, yet I feel like I know everything—the sound of her voice and her cry and her laughter; the feel of her touch and the kiss she'd place on my left cheek every day before leaving. A vague recollection of her movement when she still breathed within me became present after my wake; my hand instinctively caresses my now flat tummy at the feeling the memory sends to my chest.

And as the doctor halts before the wooden door and turns its silver knob, there is a series of loud cheering and crying and laughter that unexpectedly takes me by surprise—I knew it shouldn't, as it is such a natural reaction.

My mother is the first one to run to my figure and embrace me in her arms; Jim's mother is next; then comes Kaley and Mayim and Simon and the rest. They weep on my shoulder and I weep on theirs a song of happiness and relief and retrieval. Until the last one pulls away; and for the first time, I realize Jim is not in the room. So I ask, "where's Jim?" And the smile on Kaley's visage says it all.

She takes Mayim by the arm and Simon by the shoulder; my mother turns to them and wipes a droplet from her skin. "We should leave you," she states, her gaze shifting to me. "He'll be back in no time."

And as they leave one by one through the door, the doctor helps me off the chair and onto the bed anew. The white covers are fresh as they graze my skin and light as they collapse atop my body.

"You still have to rest, Mrs. Parsons," he says with a gentle beam. "But I'll be back as soon as the results are out. If you need anything, click on this button and the nurse will be right with you."

I thank him, and he nods his head once before stepping out the door.

During the time I am alone, which is actually just less than a minute that to me feels like ten, I recall, recall everything that dashed past my intellect while I slept. How is it possible that something seeming so real was verily not? I felt it: the pain in my head and the sorrow after my recovery of memories; the hatred towards Colin and love towards the Jim who failed to remember me but still loved; the way my heart drummed and my skin bristled during our doting in the woods, and the dread in my chest as I ran away with his baby growing within me. Of course, I am thankful for waking up. But in a way, I fear all that I had missed, knowing I will never be able to get it back.

And right then, the door creaks and opens; light steps bounce throughout the walls of the room; and a voice—a sweet, high-pitched voice that mildly says, "mommy?" and immediately sends my body to sobs of love and joy. She is beautiful, with the ivory skin color of her father and green eyes of her mother; hair a deep shade of brown with rays of caramel and amber falling past her shoulders. Freckles decorate the rosy hue of her cheeks.

Jim walks towards the bed and lowers Lizzy beside me, kneeling himself to level his sight with ours. And as he does, I notice the pearls that crystalize his eyes as well—of jubilation and relief. But there's no moment to say anything else, because Lizzy lastly throws herself in my arms and embraces me along a sentiment I had never felt before. It explodes within my chest and travels through all the veins below my skin.

"And prince daddy finally kissed princess mommy so she wakes up," she says, rising her arms in triumph. "The spell is broken."

A series of chuckles leave both of our lips as she says so, and Jim turns to me with immense adoration drowning the seas of his eyes. "Yes... finally," he whispers, caressing my head.

Jim's POV

An hour and a half later, Lizzy has fallen asleep by Amelie's figure. I watched them as she read The Beauty and The Beast with that lovely voice I missed along every thread of my nerves, took in her laughter and the elegant movements of her hands as she held the book with one and caressed our daughter's mane with the other. And lastly, I absorbed the feeling of her eyes as they fondled mine in silence—a beautiful and powerful silence.

She closes the book and lowers it by her side, then stretches her hand for me to hold. And I take it along such gentle nature, afraid that if I grasp her too hard she might break; but concomitantly wanting to with every living cell of my frame, as though not doing it might make her slip away.

"How are you feeling?" I ask, never breaking the connection in our orbs.

"I'm doing fine. Much better than when I'd just woken up."

"Of course." The conversation hangs through the wind.

"So tell me."

I feel senile.

And she replies, "everything. Where's Colin?"

And at that, I take a deep breath. In all that time she'd been asleep, I'd never stopped to plan how I would explain everything when she woke. But the glimmer of fear in her eyes as she spoke his name, as though the sole mention would make him appear before us again, shaped the words in my mind as if they'd been there this entire time. "After I recovered you from his kidnap," I begin, recollecting the gruesome memories. "The police began an investigation. It was not easy to get him; he slipped from them several times. And the more Lizzy grew in your tummy, the more I feared that he was still out there." A pause.

"And then?" The need to know more echoes throughout her tone.

"Well... eventually they caught him, about a week before Lizzy was born," I say, shifting my sight to the gesture of our hands. "He died in jail." And a vacant silence fills the air. There is a level of shock that radiates from her; but also, evidently, of a relief perhaps she feels sorry of experiencing.

"Goodness," she mutters. "I never expected—how? Why?"

I shrug. "At first they told me it had been a jail fight. But after some studies, they said they found a peculiar substance in his veins."

"Drugs?"

I shake my head. "Not exactly. More like venom. I don't remember the name. So it was either suicide, or someone in there really wanted him dead."

The conversation hung through the ambience anew. "And Karen?"

"They also caught her. For what I know, she is still alive, but caged. However..." The way she caresses my hand sends a shudder rushing down my spine, and my voice threatens to break in a sob. "What's important is that we are all fine... You have no idea how much I missed you. But that you are awake now, with Lizzy... it's everything to me. For years... it's all I ever wanted."

"You are so strong, Jim." Her voice is nearly a whisper. "And you did such an amazing job."

Yet, I shake my head. "At times I was not sure how I would put myself together; I was a mess. But when she was born and we did not lose you... I don't know, something told me you would be with us again, and that notion gave me all the strength I needed to continue."

A tear slides down her cheek. "Thank you," she says, tightening her grip on my hand. "For not giving up on me."

And at that, my heart sinks deeper into my chest. "Never," I reply. And finally, for the first time in more than three years, I lean in to kiss her lips... and they kiss me back—after all those times I'd closed the gap between us with no response by her, with no continuation of the gesture. Sparks fill the darkness as though it was the first time, and our arms embrace each other in a warm castle of I missed you and I love you and I am never leaving your side again. Because love conquers, not just the heart, but everything... in such an unconditional way.

THE END