Music For Cars

XI

*Ricky’s POV*

"Let’s go, Rick." Chris yelled into my room later in the afternoon. My eyes hurt from the nap I just took. I always wondered why waking up from a nap is often harder than waking up from a full night’s sleep.

"Why?" I groaned. 

"We’re going to hang at the studio. Work on some things." He growled. 

"Ugh." I continued to groan, throwing myself out of bed. 

I made my way down the stairs. My bowl of soggy, barely eaten cereal was still on the counter. 

It sucked… We drove in silence to the studio. I sat in the backseat as (Y/N) and Chris held hands over the PRNDL. 

I sat with my guitar in the corner, strumming ideas away, watching the others converse and get drunk over lyrics. I wasted a whole pack of cigarettes after being forced to come here.

"Going for another smoke?" Josh looked over at me from his board.

"Uh, yeah." I answered, looking around awkwardly, looking down. 

"That’s, like, your thirteenth in the past two hours." Devin giggled slightly. Chris scowled over at me. I knew it would take forever for him to become normal towards me again. 

I went outside, the heat soaking through my black jacket. I stared through the window. There’s nothing more painful than seeing your friends and loved ones having fun without you. It hurts like a knife to the chest.

I stared at her…her hair was down and covering her face. Things weren’t okay since she told me the truth. I can’t help but soak up every detail of her beauty…her hands, the way each vein shows up as a pale blue and purple…her mouth, the straight teeth bumping against mine from the one night of heaven.

She glanced at me and looked away in a panic. It looked like she was excusing herself.

"Ricky." She whispered, joining me for a smoke. I offered her my light.

"What’s up?" I wondered, hoping things could go back to normal.

"You should find your own place." She mumbled.

"Whoa, what?" I laughed. "I’ve lived her for years and you’ve only lived her for a few months." 

"I know, but I think it would be better for…Chris…in the meantime." She looked at the sidewalk, away from me.

"You mean you." I chuckled taking another drag. I could tell I wasn’t having any effect on her anymore.

"You know I can’t be found with you." She glanced through the window at Chris.

"What?" I giggled, thinking I was crazy. "Or he’ll dump your ass?"

"Yes!" She whispered, trying to shush me.

"I wouldn’t let him do that." I gave her a gentle look. 

"Ricky…" She shook her head and headed inside. I’m getting real tired of her shit…