Oh How Times Have Changed

IV

Walking onto the pitch for football practice, I was the only one already out here. Dressed already because I wouldn't dare change in the changing rooms in school. I spend a lot of the school day locked in a toilet stall for various reasons.

I had actually tried changing in the proper place once and everyone had stood and gawked at me. Afterwards, I heard whispers of guys teasing each other that I was 'looking'. As if they weren't all the ones staring at me. Hypocrites. As if I'd be attracted to any of those goons; their packages are probably the same size as their brain.

Coach sent me a solemn nod and I nodded back. We have a weird relationship. I could tell he didn't like me in the slightest- like many of my team members- but he recognises my skill, so he allows me to play. However, he doesn't do much to stop the comments on the field, so it's not that helpful. I feel so tired of the whole thing. I may as well quit at this point; take footie up again in University when I'm not at risk of being pulverised by my own team.

I did some stretches to get myself ready before I ran a lap around the field. As a striker, I need to work on my endurance levels, especially after some time off. I was only half way around the field when I suddenly found myself tumbling to the ground- a goon had tripped me while I was running past. My legs were coated in mud and my fresh, white football kit was now covered in grass stains.

I felt anger bubble inside of me, but I tried to push it down. I kept reminding myself that it wasn't worth it and that I had been dealing with this sort of thing for years. I took deep breaths, my anger barely keeping at bay.

"We don't want you on our team. Fuck off with your boyfriend, Felix." He sneered, turning around to walk back to his friends.

I couldn't keep my anger at bay this time. I felt like ripping his head off for talking to me like that regardless. He had been stupid involving Felix in this because it made me snap. I leapt up with a war cry, tackling the gloating oaf from behind. He fell to the floor with a thud and I started kicking him with all of my power. I was fuming. Enraged. He was screaming at me to get off of him, but all I could see was red. They'd put me through hell for long enough.

"Not so strong now are you?" I screeched, my cleated foot stamping on his body.

I must have looked feral because I certainly felt wild. Unchained.

By the time the other goons got me off of him, the guy was covered in blood and muddy footprints. My fists were bloody too, but I didn't notice the stinging sensation until the angry haze lifted. Then I realised what I'd done. I was definitely going to get kicked off the team for this. Not to mention, I had definitely escalated the entire situation. I'd probably jumped after school and beat to a bloody pulp. Fuck.

I looked around and saw one of the guys holding me back was Jimmy Wellot. I shrugged him off and stormed across the football field, much to the Coaches protest. I didn't care anymore, I just wanted to get out of there. My skin was still burning hot with anger, my cheeks flushed. My heart was pounding in my ears; adrenaline pumping through my veins. I grabbed my stuff and headed to my car, throwing it in and locking the doors after me. I wouldn't be surprised if one of them tried to rip the door off of my car after the stunt I just pulled.

I pulled out my phone and rang Felix.

"Hello?" Felix's confused voice rang through, "I thought we weren't meeting for another hour."

"Uh, what I was doing was cancelled. Are you free now?"I asked, my voice wobbling a bit. I bit my lip nervously.

"Uhm..." I've messed it up, haven't I? "Yeah sure, but I'm at my dorm right now."

"I can pick you up? What's your address?" I asked, excitedly punching his response into my google maps, "See you soon."

I felt like a little kid again, excitement flooding through my veins. I was practically bouncing in my seat by the time I pulled up outside the university dorms, shooting a text to Felix to let him know I was outside. I threw my dirty gym bag to the backseat and brushed the seat off, changing the radio station to something more upbeat as I waited.