Laplace's Demon

-08-

How long have I walked?

How many steps must be taken to reach where she is?

I want to get to her.

I need to.

My feet were sore, my breathing became heavy, I could feel the loud thumping of my heart beat. My shoulders hurt from the straining of my backpack, every step was making my head light. I was tired, very tired.

My footing came to a stop and I released a sigh of relief as I saw the huge bridge in front of me. Its original bright red colour seemed oddly faded under the moonlight, from afar, it looked almost grey. I slung the strap of my backpack over my shoulder, carrying it on my left hand tiredly, dragging it across the floor. I took a step on the bridge, my mind drifting off.

Closing the middle of the bridge, my hand loosened and the bag fell flatly onto the ground, my feet gave way as I collapsed on my knees, lying on my side as I fell asleep.

✡

i wish i could love myself

-knj

✡

I woke up to a start, the sun scorching brightly on my face, the sound of buzzing streets were nowhere to be heard and the sky lightened with the chirping of birds and insects. I scrambled to sit up, my throat felt dry as my skin burned up red.

"Great day for a tan, huh?" a voice asked, from beside me.

I turned in its direction, a girl was staring off into the sea, wearing a pink crop top and a pair of denim shorts, sunglasses propped on the top of her head. Her hair was short, brown and choppy. She turned around slightly and I stumbled up realising it was Eliza.

"Eliza, wait don't--"

She chuckled, "Don't worry, I won't do it yet, time traveller."

"How did you know?"

"I've had my suspicions from the very start of the year, at first I thought you just became a crazy stalker type of dude, but after that talk we had a while ago, turns out it was true."

"Why?" my voice cracked as I spoke, I didn't care if my mouth tasted like sandpaper, I just want answers, "Why would you do this?"

"Desperate to return me, aren't you? I didn't expect you to come this far, you shouldn't have come here, at least let me leave in peace."

"I'm not here to return you to your family, I just came to stop you from doing this to yourself. I don't know why I came back in time, but I know one thing, I have to save you."

"Save me?" she laughed sarcastically, "You don't know, do you?"

"Know what?"

"Didn't you find it slightly weird that I didn't have a grave? That the police hardly uttered about my death, or my family?"

"I--"

"Of course you didn't," her eyes were glued to the sea, "they couldn't trace back where I came from, no records of anything about me in the world. They probably thought I was abandoned and was brought up by someone secretly. But no. It was like I simply appeared out of nowhere."

"So, what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I'm not from this universe, I don't exist here. You think you were sent back to save me," she scoffed as she turned around, "they want you to make me go back, they can't, it's unbelievable how I even managed to stay here for this long."

"What are you talking about? Let's talk it out, alright?" I walked closer to her, she placed her hand in front of her defensively.

"Don't you dare get any closer,"

I raised my voice, "Will falling off the bridge solve your problem?"

"No," she looked away, "but at least my being will remain here."

"Why can't you stay? Eliza, listen to me-"

"Don't call me Eliza," she breathed angrily, "you're the reason I can't stay here, why did you think you would be the one going back in time? They can't let the both of us be in this universe at the same time."

When I didn't answer, she sighed, "I'm your version in my universe, there wasn't supposed to be an Amelia Wilson at all, much less Elizabeth Hankinson, we are the same person. Touching you may make me disappear, so stay away, please."

I took a step back, "If I don't touch you, can you stay here?"

She shook her head, wiping her red eyes with the back of her hand, "It's complicated, Jaxon. It really is. I can't stay like this for long, I don't know what will happen to me if I keep being this way." her eyes flowed with tears, "I'm scared to disappear, I'm afraid to die. I don't know what will happen when they send me back, I don't know what will happen if I continue staying here. I just hate the feeling of waiting and not knowing what I will become the next day. Why did you have to show up?"

She turned around, placing her hand on the railing, "You know, the bridge is closed off for today. Isn't the ocean so beautiful? Without the noise."

I was too stunned to say anything.

She smiled, even with her crying face, I could only think about how much emotion was present in that small smile, "I'm sorry, Jaxon," she said before sliding her two legs onto the iron bars. I ran to stop her, at that split moment when she heaved herself off the sides, I crashed into the railing forcefully and watched as she fell,

and fell,

and fell,

before hailing into the sea with a smile.

I could only remember my knees buckling as I screamed in anger, I closed my eyes for what felt like a second before opening them again.

It was then I realised that I wasn't on the bridge anymore.

Someone peered over me, "Hey, dude. Wake up already."

September 11, 2018

I was back at the nurse office.

-end-