a wish upon a star | TOM HIDDLESTON FANFIC

tutte la starde portano a Roma

The alarm clock rang. Eowyn got out of her bed slowly, trying not to disturb her babies. She petted Cookie's head. It started to purr loudly. Eowyn chuckled. She headed to the kitchen and made herself soufflé pancakes and Dalgona coffee. She was feeling better after what happened in the UK. She felt in peace.

The only explanation of that morning was her body suddenly rejecting her antidepressants and mood stabilizers. She never had something like that afterward.

She had called Elena from the airport and just said she was returning to Rome because Pancake got incredibly sick. Of course, Elena did not buy that but she played along. Her best friend was a rock sometimes. She acted all cold and even brainless sometimes. Tom Hiddleston had an interest in her and she ran away.

Eowyn called Elena that morning. She intended to ask how everything was in the UK clinic. From another corner of her mind some distorted voice whispered a name: Tom.

Eowyn shook her head and dialed Elena's number. An uninterested, dull voice picked up.

"Hello?"

"Hi, El! What's up? How is everything in London?"

"Well, it could have been better if our boss was here. But we're doing fine."

"I see," Eowyn wanted to ask about Tom. She clung to her silence instead.

"Anything else?" asked Elena her voice sent shivers down Eowyn's spine. She was mad. Like really mad.

"No. Nothing else." She stopped for a second "El!" it was too late. Elena has already hung up.

Eowyn whispered anyway "I am sorry,"

She ate her pancakes and drank her coffee in silence. All while feeling the presence of the dark clouds hovering over her head. It wasn't a good sign. Her medications have been working just fine for years now. What has changed all of a sudden? Was it because she liked someone for the first time in a decade?

She felt her blood slowly boiling up in her. She felt like a kettle on a stove, overfilled with water. As the kettle grew hotter the water was going to overflow. And eventually it did.

"This isn't fair!" yelled Eowyn, slamming her plate on the kitchen counter, "All my life I have always put up with this bullshit! The higher I climbed, the harder I fell. I didn't even take two steps this time! Then why? Why do I feel like this?"

Her voice cracked with the last words. Salty tears sunk deep within her and she made a decision: to simply bury the emotions somewhere in her unconscious mind.

She moved on to cleaning the glass and the plate.

It was easier this way.

***

The alarm clock rang. Eowyn got out of her bed, swallowed her pills, and stretched on her way to the kitchen. She made coffee. As she drank the pitch-black liquid she thought about her life. Everything that happened to her. Every bad thing she has done. It didn't take much for her to think she is guilty of everything that happened to her.

She was spiraling down the rabbit hole.

She knew this wasn't healthy. She knew every minute she doesn't reach out for help is a therapy session backward. She has spent one and a half-decade on her mental health and for what? To end up waking up alone every single day apparently.

She slowly sank down onto the marble kitchen floor. She shut her eyes. A drop fell, leaving a sparkly trail over her cheek.

***

The alarm clock rang. Eowyn got out of her bed. She cleaned the litter boxes and changed the water in the cat spring. She added some cat food to the cat feeder and went to the kitchen. She opened the fridge and took out the Coke. She poured some to a glass and drank it in one go.