Chapter 40

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"Hi baby" I hear and my eyes flutter open and I see him looking down at me as he sits on the side of the bed, his large hand reaches out moving a stand of hair out my face

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"Hi baby" I hear and my eyes flutter open and I see him looking down at me as he sits on the side of the bed, his large hand reaches out moving a stand of hair out my face.

"Ace?"

"I promised I'd come back to you" his smile soft as his fingers traces a line down my temple before cupping my cheek. I sit up wrapping my arms around his neck, holding his tightly. His arms snake around my waist as his face dives into the crook of my neck.

"I'll away be..."

"Camila!" I hear and my eyes ping open, Asher is standing by the side of the bed looking down at me.

What no!

"Why would you waken me!?" I sit up raising my voice. I must've fallen asleep reading the notebook again.

"It's two Pm, Cam. I don't want you sleeping day and night"

"I don't care!" It wasn't real and now I can't see him anymore, that dream was different from the others. Before he would be begging for my help but this time he was here in our room. It felt so real like I could feel his touch again, I could've sworn he was here.

"We're having a meal at George and Hannah's so shower"

"I'm not going" I lay back down pulling the duvet higher back up my body.

"Yes you are, it's been a week since his memorial. You need to start living again"

"How can you even say that!? He was your best friend, how can you just be fine that he is gone"

"Because he wouldn't want us laying around crying for him, he'd want us to get on with life and do great things, I fucking miss him too Cam it isn't only you but I'm trying to stay strong for you! So get up, you are going!" He walks out slamming the bedroom door behind him.

After ten minutes of laying down I finally get up and drag my feet into the shower, I don't put any effort into how I look, only wear black jeans and one of Ace's plain black t-shirts with a pair of black nike trainers. I look into the mirror on the wardrobe door and stare at my reflection, my eyes puffy with dark circles around them. I look like shit and to be honest I couldn't give two shits what I look like. I've lost some weight but I'm not the weight I use to be before I gained some, I'm trying I really am but I just don't feel hungry and when I eat I'm full within seconds.

I walk down the hall and Ash comes out the living room, "When are you even going back to New York?" My tone full of annoyance.

"When you learn how to live again, lets go" he pushes me out the door.

"Camila, Hi" Hannah says to me before pulling me into her embrace, "Dinner shouldn't be long, Lilly is in the living room if you want to go say hi"

I nod and head to the well decorated living room, photos hung of all the family. I ignore the ones that Ace are in.

I sit down onto the floor beside Lilly as she sits chewing on a teething toy, her eyes trained to Moana playing on the tv. She hasn't noticed my presence yet.

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