This Is Us

Chapter 4

Harry’s POV:

We were practicing One More Night by Maroon 5 when Alyssa began singing. She had a wonderful, it was deep yet soft. She was singing with her eyes closed, a smile on her face. Yet from the corner of the eye I saw Niall tense as we were nearing the chorus. As soon as we started the chorus I saw Alyssa’s voice falter and lips quiver. Yet she continued singing. As soon as the song was over she got up, Niall followed her. Was this song related to her past?

Alyssa came out her hand entwined with Niall’s. My heart sank for some unknown reason. She sat next to Niall while the practice continued. Next we were singing Animals and Maps, she was singing properly and not once did her voice falter. Apart from me only Louis noticed something was wrong. Too soon the practice was over but I didn't need to go anywhere since me and Niall were related, like we were distant cousins. So I was staying at his place. I saw that Alyssa had dumped a bag on the sofa. Oh so even she was staying over. Great.

By the time I change and come out wearing only my sweats she is seated along with Niall on the couch. They are watching Monk. I go us some dinner, that is making pasta for everyone. After half an hour when pasta is ready I see that Niall and Alyssa are having a tickling math, I set the pasta on the table and join Alyssa and Niall. I tickle Alyssa and Niall shouts “Die Alyssa its us two against you.” She laughs and its like the purest sound I have ever heard. Niall gets up to get himself some water when Alyssa stands up to tie her hair up. As soon as she is done I tickled her again, she tickles my sides and clutches my hand as I blow air into her ears. Soon we both are on the floor, I am lying on top of her she looks into my eyes, I feel the blood suddenly rush to my cheeks and the heat rise up my necks. Suddenly I feel a finger poking me in the ribs and I start laughing, I collapse in a fit of giggles. Alyssa stands up, her hands on her waist and smirks. I raise my hands as if to surrender and she chuckles and walks to the kitchen.

 She is getting plates from the drawer while Niall is already eating. That leprechaun can eat hell lot of food and yet he doesn't get fat. Alyssa takes very little pasta, almost like she is starving herself. I see Niall notice, he opens his mouth to say something but decides against it. I take a spoon of pasta and put it in Alyssa’s plate. She doesn't say anything, she just remains expressionless. She eats the amount of pasta she had put for herself and leaves what I had put on her plate. She picks up her plate, puts it in the sink and goes upstairs. Niall shrugs his shoulders and is expressionless but dumps his plate and goes upstairs. I just sit there wondering what wrong did I do in giving the girl some food?

After eating I put my plate and walk to my room when I hear muffled sounds from my room. Alyssa and Niall. They are talking but in my room. I suppose this was where Alyssa used to stay. Niall just storms out of the room, raising his hands in exasperation. I walk in and see a strange sight. Alyssa had a bottle pressed to her lips but she isn't drinking. I walk up to her and take a sip from the bottle, its water. Alyssa doesn't even look at me, she’s staring out to the endless horizon. The eyes which I thought were brown are actually black. Black like the colour of sorrow, pain, grief and anger. And she was taking out the anger she had on the world on herself. The place where her shorts ended her almost caramel skin started, she looked flawless. Her hair was framing her face in an astonishingly beautiful manner. Yet she was oblivious to her beauty as she sat there hating herself more than anything in this world.

 I decide against my will and leave  her alone and head downstairs. I go down and see Niall sitting with his head in his hands, a piece of paper in front of him. I sit in front of him and tell him to talk to me. And surprisingly he moves the piece of paper towards me. Something is written in a neat cursive handwriting, Alyssa’s.

“She agrees that the first cut is deep afterall it was caused by her first love but to her the second scar was more painful. She placed it right above the first. Making her come back to reality and making her realize that love didn't make a person, it only destructed. And now she vowed never to love again. Since she knew that her second love would cause the scar to run deeper.

She’s not proud of all she had done and one day she will wake up and realize how her feelings were misunderstood.”

Reading this made the hair at the back of my neck stand. Alyssa had taken the path to self harm. But she was my princess I couldn't let her hurt herself. “Niall why does she do this?” “Harry she learnt the lesson that many people don't learn till they grow old. She has learnt that love isn't redemption it is damnation. That too the hard way.”I just nod and sigh. This is why she fears to let anyone near her, she feels that she would fall for them and she would be deceived.

I get up and walk up to my room. Alyssa is still sitting in the balcony, but this time her eyes are closed. She is sleeping or is at least pretending to. I go outside and take out a cigarette, however like every time I don't have the courage to light it. I just hold it between my lips and somehow that gives me peace. It was getting cold. I wake Alyssa up but she doesn't. Her breathing is soft. I shake her again but she doesn't wake up. I panic and call Niall. He comes in and his eyes dart towards her hand that is hiding under her jacket. He pulls it out and sees the cut. Its fresh. Thats when realization hits me, she wrote the note to show she was going to cut herself another time yet I couldn't interpret it. I was such a fool.

But Niall was frantic. He lifted Alyssa up so easily as though he did it everyday. He put her on the bed and ran to get the first aid kit. Alyssa was lying next to my seated body. I looked at her she looked so peaceful like that, almost like she had no problems in life. Niall walked in and bandaged her hand. He was swearing under his breath. He brought an injection and two minutes later Alyssa’s eyelids fluttered open. She was awake, she wanted to get up but Niall held her down. He looked pissed off.

He shook her until she clenched the back of his shirt and pulled him into a hug. She placed her head on his chest while he patted her back. She turned around and saw me. Surprisingly she walked over and hugged me too. But this time she hugged me tighter than I assumed she had hugged Niall, soon her breathing was soft, she had fallen asleep. I lay her down and caressed her when she whispered in her dreams “I hate you Daniel. I really really hate you.” she muttered and pulled me closer. Soon I was asleep, with her right beside me. But my dreams were haunted with those words “I hate you Daniel, I really really hate you.” Who was Daniel and what had he done to my Princess that had scarred her so deeply?

(80 -85 reads? Picture of Daniel on the side)