HALLUCINATION

CHAPTER 6

CHAPTER 6

ALL, NOT REAL, BRAD, LIFE, PSYCHIATRIC………….. Wait, what... psychiatric?

‘Mother, are you trying to call me a lunatic…..are you trying to say that I, your daughter, am crazy?’ I yell at her with all the power of all the twenty something emotions I am feeling.

‘Really Anne, out of all the things I just said to you, that is all you got out of it?’ she says with a sigh. I can already feel her patients wearing thin but right now I am not any better. ‘Look Anne, I am not saying that you are a lunatic, all we are here for is to help you through this time, help you find your place back in life and most of all help you differentiate what is real in your from what is not. For example, Brad and your marriage are not real’ ooooh no she should not have said that, I mean how could she? Before I know it, the words are spilling from my brain through my mouth

‘How can you say that to me mother, all those years when you and dad will get into ridiculous fights and forget about me, Brad was there, he has always been there and will always be’ I can feel that headache coming up now, but right now the ache in my head feels like nothing compared to the ache in my heart. ‘I know you don’t like Brad mother, but this is too low, even for you.

I turn my back on her before I say something I will regret, but my anger is stronger than my moral, so I tell her without facing her

‘You know what; if you will not acknowledge him, please disappear from our lives all together. I am just going to grab my things and get out of this hell hole cuz I do not believe a word of all you just told me, so if you will just excuse me I will be on my way now’ at this point my vision is already clouding with a bit of black and I can fell the tears running freely down my cheeks.

As I approach the door the nurse stands in my way and tries to grab me, who does she think she is? I start to push her out of the way but I feel all energy drain out of me as I lift my hands and collapse to the ground……what’s happening to me is all I could think. I feel my mother at my side in no time begging me wakeup, at the same time I think I hear Brad also.

‘Baby please wake up, I beg you please wake up’

The vision of my mother blurs into that of Brad and then back into hers. I can faintly see her crying over me and begging the doctor to do something quick. I can also hear the doctor telling the nurse to bring something from his office while he said to no one in particular

‘We cannot let her go back, she can’t slip out of our fingers. Not this time’

And with that; poof, BLACKOUT………….

I wake up to the sound of someone crying and begging me to wake up. I try to open my eyes but they feel so heavy. After like two minutes my eyes open and I see Brad staring at me with tears in his eyes. He suddenly encases me in a hug and says

‘Thank you for coming back to me’

I smile at him, but I am very confused with all that just happened. Did that just happen? I can feel my throat beginning to tighten as I try to figure out how my mother could have made up such things

‘You were having a bad dream and I couldn’t wake you up, I was so scared, you just refused to wake up and you were crying and sweating and… I just did not know what to do’ he explains snapping me out of my thought.

‘It was in an unfamiliar place and darling you would not believe all that happened to me, my own mother was trying …..’ babe what’s wrong? One look at him and I knew something was off. Then I remember he was not around when I went to bed

‘Where were you anyways?’

‘Sweetheart please I need you to be strong for me, for us’. Oh no, did he cheat on me, is his lover pregnant, is she prettier than me? All of these thoughts run through my mind at once

‘Go on, you can tell me anything’ my heart is beating so fast and loud that I can barely hear myself think

‘Well the thing is………… your mother is dead’

‘WHAAAT…….WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?