I stepped out of the shower, my hair dripping and the water droplets running down my body. I wrapped my black towel tightly around my body and stared at my reflection.
My skin was bare and I looked tired despite how much sleep I had gotten over the past twenty four hours.
Justin was still passed out on my bed but I had woken up from a nightmare and had been unable to go back to sleep.
I felt dirty, tainted, violated and even though I believed Justin whole heartedly about Ricky not having actually done anything I still couldn’t stop my skin from crawling.
My wrists and forearms and hips and waist were red from me scrubbing them raw, trying to scrape the feel of Ricky’s touch from my skin.
I had five bruises the size of fingertips on the inside of my forearm and they gave me chills to look at.
I hated feeling this vulnerable.
My mind wouldn’t stop flashing images of what might have happened.
What if Justin hadn’t been here?
What if Ricky had taken me back to his house rather than mine?
What if, what if, what if?
I was scared. Never in a million years had I thought that I would be drugged, but I guess no-one thinks that. It was unnerving how easy it was for Ricky to do that.
Both my parents had hammered into me that I should never leave my drinks unattended and if I did, never pick them back up. I should always watch them being poured and never accept them from strangers and yet I had been too wrapped up in my problems that I gave Ricky the opportunity to take advantage of me. An opportunity that he took.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, willing myself to calm down.
Nothing had happened.
I had to remember that, I was getting worked up over what might have been and I couldn’t let that happen. I had to focus on more important things, like talking with Justin and finally putting this Daisy thing to rest.
I had thought a lot of about it while I was lying in his arms, trying to fall back to sleep and we needed to sit down and discuss it like mature adults.
I loved him deeply and I didn’t want some girl ruining what we had because I had realised that Daisy had gotten exactly what she wanted. She had caused tension between Justin and I and it made me so angry.
Not at her but at myself for falling right into her little trap, for allowing myself to get played by her and give her a way to drive a wedge between Justin and I.
I started to drag a comb through my freshly washed hair, roughly trying to smooth out all the knots and tangles.
