Another poem book because I have learned how to write not as shitty poems

You Found Me, You Lost Me, You Found Me

Based on a book. Can you guess which one? 

You've been looking for me by the garden

As if the flowers will tell you where I went

Id say I'm sorry but then you'll really know

About my body in the lake far from home

You've been looking for me by where we started

At the bell tower looking over the world

You were going to do what I planned too

But I saved you so I could fall first

We could be like the star crossed lovers:

I'll be your Romeo and you'll be my Juliet

I wish that I could save you

But I'll be dead before I can

Floating in the water with your fingers wrapped around my hand

The water froze with me inside it

I was trapped in a memory,

Trapped in the act,

I hope you won't find me

I'm sorry I made you wonder where I am

I'm sorry that you'll see me like this:

Eyes wide open begging you to understand

Follow the map to every place I've been

The spray painted buildings all a victim to my hands

My shoes added to the collection on the power line

My body's cold but I'll be alright

I'm sorry for doing the same as you were going to do that night

And For sending you on a journey to where I stole my life

But I couldn't stand to see your face as I told you I've given up my fight

I couldn't accept the fact that you cared

I felt invincible too

Just like you did

The wind in our hair,

Toes in the air,

Our feet teeter on an unsteady mind

Because The building will never move

I was going to plummet to the ground

But I stopped because I couldn't let you

I was going to hold your hand as we fell now

But it was all happening so soon

Taking your step with a stranger:

It seems like a fairytale

After all they all started so dark

Maybe our story wasn't so off

But can this just stay between you and me?

If you don't mind the air already knowing all my secrets

The water was serine and cold

My hair wasn't tossing and turning like it did when we had the windows down

I tied the weight around my ankle,

Let it pull me to the ground,

So I could understand how it was for you

Having me around

You knew where I was,

Where I went,

But you still searched

And on the depressing journey you went

Did you pause by the water,

Imagined you saw my face?

Did you skim your fingertips along the plastic waste

Realize it was me in this lake

You'll see me at the edge,

My words written where your feet once laid

I hoped that you wouldn't have came back here

But I decided to write you just in case

I don't want to romanticize my death

I don't want you to always see me

But by taking my breath I realized that's when I could finally breathe

I wish you didn't understand me 

( hint hint it was All The Bright Places)