Older Brothers | ✔

t w e n t y s i x

The second I felt Jon's arms embrace me, I started bawling like a baby.

I dug my fingers in his shirt and heartbroken sobs escaped my mouth

My will to control myself was gone, I felt hurt, betrayed and thorn apart.

This whole thing meant so much to me and Victor and Caleb just needed to destroy it.

I was so close, I stood on the stage, why couldn't we just have started playing.

Why did we stop and read Caleb's messages.

My own childish desire to let my brothers, my family, see what I could do made me suffer so much.

I was weak. The happiness I felt, when I heard my brothers would make it felt disgusting.

I never was strong or brave, I relied on them, all the time it wasn't me. It was always them.

Everything I could do, I wanted to do was because Victor made it possible for me.

And he took it away as quickly as he gave it to me. The freedom of a normal teenager was gone.

I doubt that I would ever sing again, that he would let me. The thought of myself singing again felt unrealistic, like a lie.

"Lil, princess, it's okay." Jon's soothing voice sounded so far away.

"She will drive with us, I won't let you pull such a stunt again." Victor commanded, I felt his hand on my shoulder again.

It made me sob even more. Like a movie, every time Victor pressed against my shoulder run through my head.

All the times Simon did it rushed through my head too.

I was frightened, so frightened I couldn't even stand still. I was a mess.

"You scare her, I don't want her to have nightmares, because of you." Elijah stepped in between us, grabbing Victor's hand away from me.

"She drives with us, now that he's here, we won't do anything wrong." Xander said with confidence.

It was quiet, I turned my face into his direction. His puzzled expression was directed to the ground, then he slowly looked up, his gaze stopping at my knees.

The bleeding stopped, but the blood dried was all over my legs.

"See you at home." With this words he opened the door and went into the car. Caleb followed him, his face always directed to the ground, ashamed.

When their car drove off, I finally relaxed.

"We were too late, Lil. I am so so sorry." Jon swayed me in our hug.

"We didn't know Caleb was still so attached to this man. He really betrayed us." Elijah sighed, his hand run through his hair.

"I don't even know who he is!" I exclaimed in distress, shoving myself back into Jon's chest.

Letting out an outraged scream. "This is so stupid!"

"Mood swings." Xander whistled to lighten the mood.

With my puffy eyes and my red nose I turned around, facing him.

"Are you kidding me?" I looked him straight in the eyes. I was too busy to hold myself on two feet, I didn't notice Elijah opening the door of the second car for me.

I looked up to him, he gave me one of his cheeky grins, when I turned myself to Xander once more, the bruise on his cheek made my urge to hit him disappear.

"Did Victor hit you?" I worried, a sad expression formed on my face.

Xander just laughed. "This is nothing, I jumped at him. I am lucky that I only got one punch. This was a suicide mission." He laughed loud.