it should of been us - ethma

07: don't get too close

emmas POV

I slammed my door and sat on my bed hugging my knees and cried into them, Ethan hasn't been here for more than 24 hours and I already know this can't work, I can't look at him, talk to him, see him without being reminded of what he did, and I hate it- I hate him.

But yet again I had to swallow my pride and pretend like everythings okay.

I couldn't hear anything over my sobs but I felt an arm wrap around me, thinking it was ethan I pushed it away but he pulled me back in and hugged me tightly, 

"shh, its okay, i got you," Noah whispered softly, "whats wrong?"

I felt comforted by his words, but I really hated crying infront of people, but I couldn't help it, I was finally starting to get better, and move on and now I have to face the cause of all of this, everyday, he sleeps under the same roof as me, drinks the same water, breathes the same air- fuck. 

As much as I wanted to pull away and say I'm fine, I couldn't, because I wasn't, I felt like the walls were closing in on me and I could hardly breathe, I just layed my head on his chest and broke down sobbing into his sweater.

noahs POV

My heart dropped seeing her like this, emma never even frowns- but at the same time she doesnt smile either...

ethans POV

I sat on the couch and ran my hands through my hair being flooded by guilt by her words, it all started rushing back to me and I really didn't want to think about it, but whats even worse is, I hurt her. I made her cry. I fucked up in more than one way, and maybe I can't just come back and pick up where I left off, this ghost- his ghost, will always follow me no matter what.

- a few weeks later - 

emmas POV

Its october 27th now, halloween is right around the corner and I still don't know what I'M going to be, I've avoided ethan for the most part besides the akward car rides, dinners and the one class we have together, but I think I'm really good at pretending he doesnt exist, which is kinda hard when your bestfriend is obsessed with him, oh and not to mention, hes the new quarterback, and yeah like most cliche highschool movies, that makes him the most popular guy here. I hate it. 

Honeslty I think he does too, because as soon as we get home its hard to even get him out of bed or eat, but at school hes still a dick as usual but a- social dick? I don't know how to explain it but thats my best shot at it.

Today was saturday so Olivia and I were gonna finally go get our costumes, every year we match but I don't know as what yet this year, hm I guess we will see. 

 I walked downstairs yawning and left without even bothering to tell my mom and got into Olivias car.

ethans POV

I woke up to a bunch of texts in a group chat from school, I've been added to alot recently but I refuse to talk in any, they all annoy the fuck out of me. I groaned closing my eyes and layed there for a bit trying to drift back to sleep but I couldn't, I sat up and saw 4 good morning texts from olivia and raised an eyebrow, shes nice I guess but in a friend way, I don't get why she can't leave me alone for 4 seconds, so I texted back "gm" and went back to sleep.