AJR-Panic Attacks

Jack- 7 (Neotheater)

Jacks POV

Here we go again. Panic attack. I know what it is by now, but that doesn't mean I'll ever like them. Or get used to them for that matter.
I hate them. They make me feel so vulnerable and scared. My heart is racing like normal, and my knees are up in my chest. I need to calm myself down. Breathe Jack. Come on, you know what this is. It will end. This isn't a heart attack. You are ok. I feel my breathing start to slow down. Yay. It's over. For now anyways. I just barely settle down when Ryan comes in.
"Hey, you ok?" Ryan asks, noticing my knees are up in my chest again. I shake my head. I was sitting on my bed when Ryan came in, I'm assuming cause he heard me.
"What's up?" He asks, sitting on my bed.
"I had a panic attack." I say quietly.
"Again Jack? How many is that this week?" He asks concerned. I just shrug my shoulders.
"Jack, this isn't good. You need help." Ryan says.
"But I don't want it." I say.
"I know Jack. I'm not gonna force you to do anything, but I really think you should get help." He says.
"I know." I say.
"Well, for now, I need to make sure you feel safe and calm down, so," Ryan says. I get nervous for what he's about to say.
"So, would you like to go to the neotheater with me?" He asks. I smile.
"Yes please." He grabs my hand and we stand up and walk to his room. He sits me on the edge of his bed and pulls out the headphones. He hands me a pair and he puts on a pair. He plays one of the songs we made and we're both transformed into the place in the blue clouds and we sit down on the mountain of instruments.
"Here we go." Ryan sighs. I breathe a sigh of relief as I look out at the birds flying about. I pulled my left leg up to my chest and fold my hands around it. Other then me and Ry, the birds were the only other things in the neotheater. The music continues playing through the instruments around and below us. I calm down a lot, staring out at the birds in the clouds. I am finally in my safe place. Ryan scoots over to me and rests one of his hands on my back. I look up at him and we make eye contact, and I feel so much calmer. I think it was Ry's big brother instinct kicking in, and the bond between us seemed stronger. We are silent. Listening to the music, watching the birds, sitting next to each other.
It is home.
It is impossible to feel sad and scared as I'm up there. I lean back into Ryan and he wraps his arm around my chest. We sit there for a while, not wanting to go back to reality. Eventually Ryan breaks the silence,
"Alright, we should get back." I nod, sitting back up.
"I just don't want to leave." I say quietly.
"I know. But we can always come back." Ryan says.
"Ok." I say grudgingly. Without us saying anything or doing, the music stops, and we are transported back to Ryans bedroom.
"I never want to leave the neotheater." I say.
"I know. Neither do I." Ryan replies.
"It's just so calming and relaxing, and makes me feel like a little kid." I add.
"I know. It feels like home." Ryan says. I nod and we both go silent.
"Well," Ryan says, breaking the silence again. "Come here." He says. I stand up and he wraps me in a giant bear hug.
"Thank you Ry." I say as my face is muffled in his chest.
"Anytime Jack. I do want you to think about getting some help though." He says.
"I know." I reply, pulling away. "I'll think about it." I add.
"Good." He says. I exhale slowly, aching to go back to the neotheater. I feel much better after that. I go back into my room and resume whatever I was doing before my panic attack.