I sat in the livongroom that I shared with Ashton. It's so quit here, I miss his giggles. I stare on the wall and focus the frame with our picture in it. Why is he gone? Why did he leave? I don't wanted that to end like this. He's the love of my life, but I'm not his.
I'm not made to be loved maybe it should not be or I should not be. Without him it's not the same, there is no reason to live anymore. A tear rolls down my cheek.
He doesn't loves me, he doesn't loves me, he doesn't loves me. This thoughts are killing me. I hate to be lonely. I never will be happy again till i have ashton back at my side.
I stand up and walk to the bathroom. I opened the commode and take out my sleeping pills. It should not be.. it's not our destiny.. he's gone.. i take a half hand of the pills and put it into my mouth.
I walked to the bedroom and take a sit on our bed while i sob.
I hear a key open the front door. In hectic i put the pills under the pillow that lay beside me, as ashton walked in. Oh my god I never thought that i would see him again. "oh hey y/n.." he mumble while i stare at him. "are you a ghost?" I ask in shock. "What? No.. wait, y/n is everything ok?"
"Why shouldn't it?" I ask as a tear rolls down my cheek again. Ashton walk towards me and whipe my tears away while he's grabbing the pillow. "Anyway y/n I'm here, because i wanted to put the last things of mine out of here bec-" he stops as he sees the pills under the pillow. "Y/n what.. and why are.." he looks at me with big eyes. "Why do you thought i were a ghost?" He asks with a loud voice . "It's okay ashton, this is not your problem anymore." I looked at my fingertips. "You're gone.. forever.." i say. "Sure it is! The box with the pills is almost empty!" Ashton gets the box with the pills and trhows it on me. I cry even more at this point. Why did he do this to me?
I feel a numb feeling in my head while everythings color is slowly fading to white. I hear ashton yell bit i can't understand what it is. His yells get quiter and quiter..
