Who We Are BOOK 2: INTERNAL PASTS ✔

112

"Don't cut me down, throw me out, leave me here to waste
I once was a man with dignity and grace"

- Alec Benjamin

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Currently, you were running through the training grounds as fast as you could while trying not to slip on the wet ground.

You had only hoped that everyone was okay, even though they may had more experience than you, you still couldn't help but be concerned.

"Y/N?" You skidded to a halt at the familiar voice that belonged to Namjoon. It looked as if he was making his way back to the condo and after seeing his expression, you knew why he was running back.

"Why are you here? What are you wearing?" You bit your lip nervously since you knew that he wouldn't be particularly too happy with the reason you were about to give.

"...I came out to help-"

"Y/N, please don't do this, not now" he said sternly, making his way over to you and grabbing your hand.

"Let me help! Believe it or not, Namjoon, I'm going to become a Protector just like you which will mean that we're on the same team"

"You haven't even been training for that long- you're not ready!" And with that he began dragging you back to where you came from.

"Namjoon! Let go! I want to help!"

"As a hero, I order you to not partake in any heroic activities"

...what?

"...you... you don't see me as a hero?" You stammered out, hurt by his words and actions.

The other stopped in his tracks once he realised his mistake, turning around feeling ashamed at his poor choice of words.

"No, that's not- Y/N, that's not what I mean-"

"Tell me the truth... you were never going to see me as a hero, right?" Your heart ached. The person that you thought would support you through this, the person who came in everyday to see you in the hospital, the person who was there for you in the funeral...

Didn't believe in you.

"No no! Y/N, please don't put words in to my mouth- I just don't want to see you hurt!"

"But I can at least defend myself now!"

"I don't want you to get emotionally hurt! You witnessed not one, but two of your friends dying right in front of you! That does something to a human and you need to heal!" Taken aback, you looked at the other with wide eyes and your mouth agape.

"...I thought helping heroes through training would help me in someway. I thought that maybe Jay's death wouldn't have been in vain if I continued to help heroes save lives- save people who could have been in his place... I wasn't healing, Namjoon... I was suffering. Everyday, I was reminded by the heroes around me that I could never even be a fraction of them because I couldn't even save my friend who was right in front of me and risked their lives to save me. After losing... Taemin... it only made me realise more that I should be doing something to stop these deaths from happening. And I can't do that, if I'm stuck inside a Condo while my friends are out here trying save lives!" Namjoon listened intently throughout the whole thing. His love for you only grew and his heart ached at your words. He was being selfish. He wasn't taking your feelings in to account.

He wanted you to be safe so that he can be happy.

But, he wanted you to be happy, too.

"...I'm sorry. I shouldn't have acted like that..." your shoulders slumped slightly and instead of trying to break loose from the other, you squeezed his hand in reassurance.

"...it's okay... I forgive you" his frown grew in to a small smile at your forgiveness.

"Let's go save lives...

...just like heroes"

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A/n: step aside, Joon, let Y/N do her thing*^*/