My Psychiatrist III

Part 12

'You said I could take a look around, Elizabeth.... So I did. All I remember is that I went into a bookstore and saw some newspapers.'

'Oh yes, the Great Gatsby Bookshop, it's lovely in there,' Walt sighs with a smile.

'Shhh, grandpa, let her tell her story.' Luke whispers, holding his face in his hands.

'Well..' I continue. 'I actually don't remember much from that moment. Apart from that the newspapers caught my attention and I fainted. The reason I fainted is because... because I saw myself in there. In the newspapers. And it said something about that Tess Black still wasn't found... and now, what you don't know, is that I'd been missing since the 21st of May. I don't remember much though, but all that happened after is basically a story. The story goes that I saw myself in the newspaper, fainted, a visitor of the shop called 911, they came, one of the nurses recognized me, and he contacted the Toronto East Police when we were in the hosital. I remained unconscious until I arrived in the hospital in Toronto.' I take a bite of my pie, starting to feel slightly hungry again.

'So how did you end up in Toronto? What do you have to do there?'

'Okay, so, I kind of have two stories, one before I came to you guys, and one from after I, uh, was deported, kind of. Apparently, I went by plane from Buffalo to Toronto. And I missed out on it, which was a bummer,' I laugh. 'But back in Toronto, I woke up after three days or so. I'd been in some kind of coma, and suffered from brain damage or something like that, because I fell on my head in the bookshop. And uh, part two of the story will also explain why I can't remember shit, haha.'

'Damn, that poor head of yours has suffered much in those young years of you, baby,' Elizabeth sighs.

'Yah, hasn't been the best so far, haha. Anyways, so.... after three days of being in coma, I woke up. And I had some strangers around my side. And uh, they turned out to be my parents. Then, the day after I woke up, oh, and I was still in hospital because of my brain injury damage thing, the day after I woke up, my parent's weren't there because I wanted to take a nap, and some guy walked in. His name is Ashton, and we uh... had like, an accident together.'

'An accident?' Luke sounds worried, as he shoves his empty pie plate away from him.

'Yah... I'll get to that later. But, uhm, so, Ashton and I met, and we stayed in touch when I got home to my parents. My mum seems okay, but my dad really wanted me to pick up my life there in Toronto. He seemed to not believe me that you guys existed, and felt more like a family than they did... and they also didn't like Ashton. So basically, the two guys I know, Luke and Ashton, both didn't exist or fit in my dad's head. Which made things hard at home, with lots of anger and upset people and discussions and fights. Ashton and I kept in touch, and I stayed over at his place, but my dad would find out and get the police to get me away from him. Ashton kind of has an.. uh... criminal record, you see. Without having done anything criminal though.'

'He doesn't seem like it.' Luke says. It makes me smile and I shake my head.

'Have you met him?' Walt asks surprised.

'Yeah... he uh, dropped me off here today,' I smile as my eyes drop to the table, thinking of Ashton. 'He helped me, because uhm, the final part of that story is that I really hated it at home in Toronto. And Ashton was the only friend I had who would actually listen when I talked about you. And one day, we decided I was going back to here, to you guys... that day was yesterday.'

'Wow, you must have had a crazy trip!'

'Yes indeed, poor you have already experienced enough trouble and adventure for the rest of you life,' Elizabeth says.

'Yeah, and that's not even the whole story... because, uhm, before Luke found me down at the river... I uh, I don't know where to start exactly. Let's say, like, a couple months before May 21st, I moved from Sydney to Toronto for my dad's job.'

'I knew it!' Elizabeth laughs. 'I knew you had an accent which wasn't from here!' I nod agreeingly.

'Yeah, Australia is the real home I've had. At least, my mum told me. I cannot remember anything actually. So, we moved to Toronto. I had to go to school, was depressed, and apparently I cut myself quite often too. I also can't remember that though. But now I understand the scars on my arm.'

'Yeah... I never wanted to tell you it probably didn't come from the river banks,' Elizabeth sighs. 'It wouldn't have been my story to tell. But a nurse will recognize those scars from any other possible ones. They're quite... unique.'

'You automutilated?' Luke whispers, his eyes growing bigger. 'Who made you do that?'

'As I said... I can't remember anything. But, I guess it was the depression. I read that depression makes you do weird things.'

'Yah.... I think we all were a bit depressed when you were gone, all of a sudden.'

'Nah, just slightly,' Luke winks as he smiles at me. His sarcasm is obvious.

'Yeah.. Enough about that though.' I continue. 'So, I was depressed. And my parents sent me to Serium, some kind of psychologist and psychiatrist centre. My parents were scared of me cutting, so they sent me to a psychiatrist. I never ended up getting medication though. But uh, at Serium, I met Ashton. He is a... uhmmm,' and I fall silent for a second. 'He wás a psychiatrist, also from Australia, and we'd apparently lived in the same district of Sydney, just one village apart. But we first met here in Toronto. Ashton and I became friends, or at least, the story goes, and we uh.. also hung out in addition to the psychiatric meetings. And one day, we went kayaking on the Niagara river. And apparently, I ended up swimming at some point, an dwas too late with getting into the kayak again, so the strong waterstream kind of uh... dragged me to the edge.'

'The edge of what?'

'Luke, hush.'

'Topography, son.'

'But..'

'Shhhh...'

'Yeah so...' I say, noticing that I don't get emotional or anything. It's probably best I cannot remember anything. 'So I fell down the Niagara falls.'

'What?!' Luke screams, and it makes me shiver for a second. 'You survived the falls?'

'Yes....'

'Oh my god, sweetheart, that explains your broken arm and amnesia so well,' Elizabeth says whilst putting her hand on my arm with empathy.

'I can't remember anything though,' I smile reassuringly.

'But still!' Luke still seems shocked. Walt remains silent.

'Wow, Tess, you won't believe how lucky I am right now.' Luke and I are cuddled up together in his single bed, and we're only wearing shirts and boxershorts. 'How a girl like you survived that drop.... I'm just astonished.' I let out a soft giggle. 'Flabbergasted. It must have been magic.'

My smile fades as I hide my face away in the crook of his neck. Ashton. His face, his red sweater, black leather jacket, his checkerboard shoes, his curls and smile... I already miss him. It feels weird. But I have made the right choice... right?