Dr. Knowles

The Choice

"I want you..."

I pointed to Michael. Shawn's heart seemed to shatter in a million pieces as I walked passed him with Michael's hand on my waist. I looked back at him and he just stood there motionless. I wondered did i make the wrong mistake? We went home and Michael unpacked my bags and put all my clothes back in my drawers. He placed the ring back on my finger and I couldn't help but admire it. I still thought about Erica with my ring,  in my bed, with my fiancé. I laid on the bed and was dozing off until Michael laid on my back. I laughed and stopped short of calling him Shawn.  He used to do that to me all the time when I was staying with him.

I pushed him off causing him to fall. He jumped up and got on top of me. I put my hands up in defense hoping he wouldn't hit me.

"Michael please don't hurt me.  I was only playing."

"Baby. I wasn't gonna hurt you, only tickle. Do I really scare you that bad? "

"Yes.." I whispered softly.

"Baby, I swear I  never meant to hurt you. I love you and care about you so much. No one will ever love you as much as I love you." Michael rubbed my face and I smiled. I know he loves me. He laid next to me with his arms around me. I was dumb near sleep when he said:

"Goodnight baby"

"Goodnight shaw--michael" I paused realizing my mistake.

"What you say?" Michael let go of me and darted off the bed. "What the fuck did you just say? Answer me Beyoncé"

"I said Michael. You heard me ." I was so scared that he heard me say Shawn. I was so scared of him. 

"Bitch you lying and I know it." He jumped on the bed and started punching me. I tried to fight back but it wasn't any use.

I screamed and wiggled. He beat me and beat me until I was bleeding from nose and lip. I laid back with my vision slowly fading. He got off of me  and rolled over to his side of the bed. I cried silently to myself. I made the wrong decision. I should've chose Shawn. Why didn't I choose him? It was around one o'clock when I decided to do what I had been longing to do. Call Shawn. 

I dialed his number and he picked up.

"Hello" he answered groggily.

"Shawn. I'm so sorry baby I'm so sorry. I made a mistake. I need you please. He hit me again and I'm scared please come get me " I whispered as I went into the bathroom

"Its Ok baby. I'm coming."

"Thank you "

"Hold on. I'm in my car. I'll be there in 5 tops."

I hung up and stood in front of the mirror. I put my hands in my hand and looked at my face. Then I saw Michael appear in my reflection. He stood in a white wife beater with his boxers.

"So you trying to leave me?" He stood directly behind me and I damn near stopped breathing.

"I--I --mich--"

"YOURE NOT LEAVING!" He grabbed me by my waist and dragged me towards our terrace. I was scared. I screamed and begged him to let me go.

"Baby please I'm not going. Im not leaving you" I held on to him because my life DID depend on it.

"IF YOU LEAVE THIS WILL BE THE ONLY WAY. YOURE MINE. I CANT LET YOU GO."

I screamed for him to stop.  I told him I'd stay but he kept in screaming that's when our bedroom door bust open and Shawn stood there. Michael held me in between him and Shawn . Shawn looked at me and all I saw rage . he charged towards me and Michael a d punched mike in his face. I ducked and stood off to the side. They fought and Shawn was tearing his ass up. Blow after blow more and more blood escaped Michaels body. He played still and Shawn finally stopped.

"Bey you Ok?" Shawn said as he walked over to me.

"Yes.  I'm so sorry Shawn. I made a mistake. I need you. Please I'll do any--" Shawn kissed me mid sentence and I was left speechless.

"Its Ok baby. Let's go." We walked out the door but I ran back inside because I forgot my phone. I saw it on the night stand. I grabbed it but fear struck when I realized Michael wasn't laying on the floor.

I looked around frantically as I looked for him. I saw him exiting our closet and I froze when I saw the gun in his hand.

"I told you, you wasn't leaving me, right?"

"Michael please" I stood still as chills were sent through my spine. He lifted the gun and I screamed.

"SHAW--"  then Michael pulled the trigger. I fell to the ground with a bullet through my stomach. I heard Shawn run through the room and tussling. Two shots rang out and I felt two arms around me. I heard Shawn's voice as I drifted off into darkness.

I woke up crying. I was hyperventilating and screaming for him. I was in bed, but not my bed. I felt two huge arms wrap around me. It was Shawn. Ugh I had been having this constant dream about choosing Michael and its horrifying. I told Shawn and he just rubbed my back and let me know he would always be there for me. I knew I chose the right one.  I relaxed a little and laid in his arms. My handsome teddy bear.

"Shawn?"

"Yea"

"Can you promise me something?"

"Promise me that you'll never hurt me, not just physically but mentally too. I can't handle it anymore. "

"I , Shawn carter, promise to never physically, mentally, or any kind of hurt, hurt you in any way, shape, or form."

"Good. Now let's seal it with a kiss."

We kissed and kissing led to touching and touching led us to stopping because neither one of us was ready for that step in our relationship.

"Goodnight pop pop"

"Pop pop?" Shawn was confused by my nickname but I had my reasons.

"Yea"

"Alright then goodnight bumblebee"

"Bumblebee?"

"Mhmm" Shawn held me as I chuckled at our nicknames. Then we drifted off to sleep.