The future
15th May, 2020
Hi x;
If you're holding on to a sharp knife, why are you surprised that it's hurting you? I know you don't want to be lonely again, loneliness is a monster we all fear. But why him? Why the person hurting you the most? Why the person making you walk on a thin sharp thread?
You say that he will change eventually, he will get better, that at least he choose you but deep down you know you're only comforting yourself. You know nothing will change, it's always going to stay the same.
As much as a relationship is about sharing, but some burdens are meant to be dealt with alone, they're not meant to be put on other people's shoulders to bear.
You think you can't break up with him because you're well into this, you're worried about him more than you're worried about yourself. You think the damage may be permanent, but you know what? As much as people like to think that hurt is infinite, it is also a fleeting thing, like any other thing in the world. It is a temporary thing that we get used to, then that we forget after. The only thing indicating that it ever hurt is the distant memory of it.
So why are you torturing yourself if you're not happy? Why shutting the voice in your head telling you to do what right? Why not choosing yourself this time?
You may look selfish to do it, you may feel guilty because you've done, you may think you're a coward for giving up, but if you think about it, isn't it worth it if it means your happiness? Isn't it worth if it means you wake in the morning light and smiling? Isn't it worth if it means getting rid of that terrible weight on your chest that prevents you from letting in the air of freedom?
I want you to be brave and do this for yourself, because I can assure you from where I am, everything is going to be just fine.
Your present self.
YOU ARE READING
10 Letters To My Past Self | ✓
No FicciónWhether your past self is 5 years ago, 2 months ago, 3 days ago or even an hour ago, we'd all want to go back and tell it something. Maybe to avoid something, or to cherish someone, or to just change a thing or two sometimes. Here are 10 letters to...
