Countdown ~TsukiHina~

~0~

~Tsukishima~

Hinata Shoyo is dead, dead as fucking myspace, and I failed to save his life. It's weird, he was alive this morning, I was literally face timing him, but now it's safe to assume he's gone. There's no other explanation for it. He just disappeared off the face of the Earth, his family and all. No one can get through to him and there's no one at his house. Hell, he doesn't seem to be anywhere in town. Yachi's tried tracking his phone and apparently he's been frozen in the middle of the motorway for the past few hours. I'll check back with her in a bit to see if he's moved yet. I know it's such a low chance but I can't give up, even if it's basically confirmed that he's dead.

It's tearing me apart inside. I just want to break down and cry for the rest of my life. Is there even a point in living anymore? My boyfriend, my fucking soulmate, just died! Where do I go from here? People are supposed to be with their soulmate forever, right? Maybe the best thing is to... well, to join him.

No, I can't just kill myself. I can't believe I even thought that! Suicide is never the best option, how many years has society been shoving that down your throat now? Hm? How dare you even think about that? Shoyo wouldn't want you to kill yourself! If he was still alive he'd tell me not to kill myself, that I should keep going and I have so much to live for but that's the thing; he'd only say that if he was alive. Shoyo isn't alive anymore. There's nothing to stop me now so I might as well do it.

What about my family? I can't break them like that, it's unfair on them when they don't even know what happened Shoyo. How am I supposed to tell them about this? My mum actually really liked Shoyo, probably more than Yamaguchi but comparing my boyfriend and best friend probably isn't something she'd do, and I doubt she'll react well to the news. Wait no, I need to stop thinking about this right the fuck now! I'm making this entire situation about me and my family, like a selfish prick, when the only person I should be thinking about is Shoyo! Oh my god I'm an awful person!

I'll hold off killing myself for a little while. There's got to be something I can live for, right? Yeah, you know what, I'll keep living for the memories off Shoyo, the light of my fucking life. I'll remember him forever and I'll make sure everyone else remembers him to. I'll visit his grave everyday; I'll bring him little gifts and leave them for him, little things that I know he loved back when he was alive, when he was mine.

As the tears start to spill down my face, only one thought remains. I close my eyes and whisper to myself. "I'll never forget you, Shoyo Hinata..."

~I'm just dropping in at the end of this chapter to let you know that this is not the final chapter of Countdown. There is still one more chapter (and an alternate ended which @denkichu_idiot gave me the idea for) so please don't leave yet. This isn't the actual ending, but I'm sure you guys all know that :3 Thanks for reading!~