Crankiplier - Unus Annus

Chapter 1

"And as always I will see you! In the next video." I completed my outro with a wink and stopped the recording. Groaning I ran my hands through my hair and saved the video to my desktop to be edited later. I had lost my motivation a long time ago and Lixian was on vacation so I had to edit my own videos. I would ask Kathryn or Ethan but they were both swamped with work and I didn't want to bother them. The stress was building up though and I didn't know how much more of it I could take.

A knock at the door made me jump and grasp the armrest of my chair tightly. My face drained of color as my anxiety kicked in not remembering any visitors scheduled today. And then I remembered, Unus Annus.

Unus Annus, translated to "one year" in Latin, was a channel Ethan and I had come up with to "remind our viewers about the inevitability of death" it was a morbid concept but it was really just an excuse for me to hang out with my best friend for a whole year. To surprise us we had Amy, my ex girlfriend but still really good friend, come up with a bunch of stupid shit for us to do and not tell us what it is until we start recording. Today was our first video.

"Hey Eth come on in, the door's unlock!" I shouted through my open recording room. I got up and walked to the living room where I saw Ethan struggle to open the door, his arms full of bags. I chuckled watching his suffer for a bit before eventually taking some of the backs from him.

"Oh Mark!" He joked with his annoying fake sad voice, "how dare you not open the door for me? Chivalry is dead!" I could tell that he was ready to film because of how excited his actions and tone of voice were. He always gets like this before a video.

"Calm down romeo," I smiled messing up his hair and giving him a shove, "so what did Ams give you for this video? It had better be something good, this is the beggining of something great." I chuckled watching him put down all of his bags. He blushed and looked down muttering something that I couldn't hear. I wondered why he got so shy until he pulled out the first item in the bag.

A collar. Then a ball gag. Then a dildo.

My eyes widened in shock and I looked up from the various sex toys, and Ethan removing them from the bag to see him giggling with a now very harsh blush on his face.

"What does she want us to do with these?" I asked with an uncertain voice. I had had a crush on Ethan since I met the blue bean and I told Amy that as soon as I realized. No relationship should be based around lies. She smiled and nodded and told me she could tell, she then told me that if I wanted to break up with her because my feelings for Ethan got in the way of my feelings for her, she would understand.

We continued dating for a few months until I realized what I thought was a crush on the adhd boy I worked with had become something more of love. I told Amy and we broke it off, she eventually ended up dating Ethan's best female friend Mika. They were cute together I had to admit. 

I texted Amy to see what the hell was going on and this is the reply I got.

Mark: Ams what. the. hell

Amy <3: What?

Mark: You gave us sex toys

Amy <3: Yeah! I want you guys to make a meal with them

Mark: You didn't tell either of us what to do with them idiot

Amy <3: It was also an experiment, I wanted to see what you guys would do without instructions

Mark: You're evil

Amy <3: I'm the best wingwoman you've got buddy. Now I have a date with the most amazing girl ever and I do believe you have a date with a certain boy

Mark: IT'S NOT A DATE

Amy <3: Keep telling yourself that

Amy <3: Ok for real Mika gets impatient so I'm gonna go, say hi to your boyfriend for me! Byeeeee

I shut my phone off with a sigh and shoved it back into my pocket. Well at least she didn't want us to do porn. I looked up to see Ethan strapping the collar onto himself with interest as if seeing how it felt, he realized I was watching though and quickly took it off.

"So what did Amy say" He asked with a nervous smile, I could tell he thought she wanted us to do porn too. I was almost sad to see this opportunity wasted but then I remembered Ethan probably doesn't like me.

"We're making a breakfast I guess"