"I sometimes ask myself, 'Why have I fallen for you? Why do I love someone who I know will never like me back?' I know you're not mine, and you never will be, so why do I keep letting myself feel this way? I can't help thinking about the times we spend together and how I'm never as happy with someone else. You make me feel a way no one else can. I replay the times we spend together in my head: our inside jokes, the way I tease you, and the times you think you're better than me and we both know you're not." I let out a slight laugh. "It's the times you look up at me when something funny happens and you have the biggest, most beautiful smile on your face." I exclaim to her. I can't hide my feelings anymore not when she letting people treat her as if she's nothing. She deserves so much more than she thinks, but she can't see that.
"I can't stop loving you, Rhianna. You mean the whole world to me, I can never imagine being with someone who isn't you. I'm so in love with you and you will never care for me the way I care for you. I never want anyone to hurt you, but you will never feel the same way for me because you are so blind to you're feelings. You don't care how others treat you, you let other people use you and treat you as if you're nothing." I pause for a second and look up at her she's standing there not saying anything. Her shoulders are dropped and her arms are down at her side. Her hands are relaxed - not tensed - and her face is full of emotion, but at the same time showing none. After her not saying anything, I continue, "You are so talented and funny and unique. I've never met someone as amazing as you and yet you still can't even see your worth." I say starting to tearing up. People say boys are weak if they cry but who cares. I love her and she doesn't love me back - how do they expect me to react, as if I don't care? Well I do care. I care more about her than I ever have about anyone in my life.
"I thought you moved on, Tom. I thought you fell in love with someone new and stopped caring about me." Rhianna shouts back at me.
"Do I look like I've moved on? I have tried so hard to move on, because my feelings are eating me up inside, but I can't - no one is you. No one will ever come near to comparing to you. I just wish you loved me back. Why can't you love me back?" I can't help raising my voice. I hate raising my voice so much but I just can't help it.
She stares at me, looking me in the eyes as if she's about to speak but before she says anything I relax my voice and say, "Don't worry about saying anything, I've spent my whole life falling for people who didn't love me back. It's nothing new but I'm scared that I'll never be able to forget you, that my all my life, whenever I meet someone new, I won't be able to fall in love with them because they're not you. I'm scared I'll never be able to love someone who isn't you."
She starts walking towards me, continuing to look me in the eyes and she says, "We can't be together, Tom. You can find someone so much better than me: someone who will treat you right. You have so many people obsessing over you, wishing that you would do so much as talk to them. I'm not the one for you, I will never be the one for you.
"What are you so scared of, Rhianna?" I ask, beginning to lose my mind. I'm not thinking about what I'm saying, it's just coming out before I can process anything.
"I'm scared that if I fall in love, I will end up just falling back out. I'm scared of breaking you, the same way other people have broken me-
"You're doing this so I don't get hurt? You're hurting me now. I'm used to everyone in my life hurting me including my family but right now you - you're breaking me more than anyone has ever broken me." I interrupt her.
"You've always meant the whole world to me, Tom, but-" Rhianna walks closer to me than she was before and stares at my lips for a second, before she cups my face with my hand and kisses me. I pull away for a second to look at her, before kissing her again. It felt magical just as people say first kisses are. It's as if birds are singing and fireworks are going off around us. It's hard to find the words as to how magical it is, it's just perfect.
We stop for air. I wish that the kiss never had to stop, I never want this moment to end. How does one thing have so much effect over someone? How can it make someone feel the way I do?
We are staring into each other's eyes neither of us saying anything, and feeling no need to say anything.
"I love you too," Rhianna says, and I smile.
