Mare's Nests

September

"Are you sure you're okay?"

I looked at my block mates. They know. They know what I am going through right now but.. no one has enough courage. Courage to dig deeper into that pain.

I smiled at her before nodding.

"Hey I'll be off first, got some appointment with Isla"

"Kay keep safe"

I waved at her before putting on my earphones. This days, no motivation was left inside of me. It's like I was only functioning because it's what I need to do.

No stop thinking about it Mnemosyne. It will get worse it you dwell more on it. After about an hour of being stuck in traffic I was finally able to reach Isla.

"You're late"

"Blame it on the traffic" She laughed it off and offered me some of the food she was eating but I instinctively waved it off even when I was hungry.

"You.. you've been losing weight lately"

"Really? Then that's good. Remember back in grade school I was such a plump person."

Isla just eyed me as I laugh off her remark. To be honest, even when I'm hungry I have no strength left to enjoy a good meal.

"By the way, Zev is planning to be a neurosurgeon"

I looked at her way, strange as it is Isla never opened up the topic about Zev in this way. It was so out of the blue.

"I thought he was planning to be in orthopedics?"

"Nah, he said he wants to follow his dream and being a neurosurgeon has always been his dream"

I wasn't able to hide the smile creeping up on my face. I won't deny it, I love hearing stories about Zev. If there's a thing I am interested right now, It's the things that concern Zev.

"So.. I guess he's still keeping in touch with you?"

"Only If you knew, he never asks about me though. It was always about you that we talk about"

I smiled, months ago Isla told us that Zev suddenly announced to their friends that he'll be moving on from me. Not like we had any relationship to begin with but hearing that I was still their topic up until now made me somewhat happy.

"So in about 10 years he's going to become a neurosurgeon"

"Yeah but weren't you also planning on continuing your course to med school?"

"I'm still not sure"

Because to tell you the truth I don't know what I want to do with my life right now. Unlike Zev, Isla and Abrielle I don't have a dream. I can't even remember what I wanted to do back when I was a child. But you know everytime I hear about Zev's dreams it's like something inside me keeps on stirring. Something like, If I continue my course to med school maybe I'll be able to meet him face to face.

I smiled, the thought of meeting him when we're both successful doesn't sound that bad.