For him (on hold)

Chapter 12- Your Kidding Me Right ?

"So , you ran without getting a good and free meal" Tony emphasizes , I slap his hand "Were you listening at all when I said that he is a dominant?" "Yes but, I would've ate, then ran" I growl but it turns into a laugh. I've missed his stupid interpretations of life. "Not all of us are fatasses like you."
We're at Denny's , with a good country feel. The smell of caffeine and pancakes with maple syrup colliding.
I look at the roses Tony bought me and inhale the smell. "God, Tony thank you." I give him a big smile. These are my favorite roses. "What For? That ? That's nothing compared to Friday." He smirks , I feel my eyes widen and my cheeks redden in heat. "Tony NO! Having you with me is enough for a birthday present" "Oh Jessica shut the fuck up" I gasp "To-" he cuts me off "Ah, the food is here" the waitress, who's name appears to be named Tammy , sets down my plate of strawberry pancakes with eggs and sausage and Tony's order of cinnamon and almond pancakes with hash-browns and bacon. But not before smirking at Tony and giving me a nasty look. I mouth to her fuck off.
Then she has the audacity to say "Enjoy!" with a fake cheery smile. We dig in and after 6 minutes of eating. We're stuffed. I order more milk and orange juice 'cause we want to swallow this down.
"So , Enough about my love life...how's Katerina?" "She's actually in Pennsylvania for a grade trip" "Oh okay, well when she comes back I would love to have a girls day out to the spa or something" "Yeah, I'll tell her she'll be totally siked" I smile in gratitude that she'll be willing to go. I then explained to Tones that I had sex with Frank and it felt totally right and that he isn't bad, he then told me he wants to meet him I said okay and then I said I'm going to continue this because I can't be scared forever he said "Well , I will always , always be there for you" which I felt praise for cause , if Tony didn't find me when he did I'd be a druggie or prostitute or worse....dead.
I looked at the time I have to go. "Thank you Tony for the breakfast and for just.....being there" he came closer to me and softly hugged me, I hugged him back. He looked at me with those warm cinnamon eyes I returned that look of love with my shamrock eyes "Always, baby girl" he says "See you tonight" he said then we parted ways. Him getting in his Benz, me riding with Esteban"
I got into the soft black leather cushioning. I wonder how many cars he has. I wonder how many women have been in my spot, which makes me frown so I shrug it off. I'm admiring the view and the scent of Frank back here, when something struck me ... I don't know much about Frank. So I made a reminder to search him up but I can also take this ride as an advantage to ask Esteban some questions. "Hey, Esteban?" He fixes his mirror to see me, I caught a glimpse of his denim blue eyes and gorgeous, wavy shaggy, blonde hair. "Hello, Ms. Corerra" then I caught his brazilian accent. I spent a summer in Brazil when I was 12 so I picked up the language pretty well. (In Portuguese) "How long have you driven for Frank ?" He looked surprised at my knowing in the language, but went back to his serious work look and replied me back in the same language "Since he was born" wow that's a very long time, by the end of the ride I learned that Frank lived a very good life, two parents, a brother, good grades ... Nothing out of the ordinary from a man like him. Also by the end of the ride me and Esteban became very well respected of each other. Couple laughs here and there. I opened the door to leave pulling out my umbrella.
"Tchau , Esteban" "Tencha um bom dia , Ms. Corerra" he said and tipped his hat.
I closed my umbrella as I entered to my psychological science class, next to Sasha. "Hey" I whispered "Hey , how was breakfast with Tony ?" Frank told her "It was great I missed him" "That's great actually I was planning that we should go out Su-" Sasha was cut off "Lady's" we turn around and see that Frank and David and Ashton are behind us. "You should listen to the Prof. Marik" David says "He's not talking" Sasha retorted. Even though he was her boss out of school in he wasn't. David was going to say something when Ella came in soaking wet and sat next to me. "Hey, guys. Did I miss anything?" she says breathing heavily "Hey" Sasha and I greet in unison. "Nah, we haven't even started, because of the rain he's gonna wait a few secs." I say, she nods. I turn around to take out my pen and notebook to see. David staring at Sasha laughing at something Ella said, Ashton staring at Ella .. OOOH gotta hook them up and Frank staring at me as if he can see every inch of my soul. I decide to tease him. Taking off my jacket showing off my bare back and my tattoos. I chew the bottom of my pen and sit back. Noticing my weird behavior Ella ask "Why are you uhh... selling yourself right now?" Her eyebrows quirk together, I roll my eyes and answer whispering in her ear "Turn around , the guy in the middle .. Right behind me that's Frank" she does so as if she gonna take out her lip balm but throws it back in and turns back to me her eyes wide "THAT'S FRANK?!" "Why are you so fucking loud?" Sasha intercepts "Yes and to the left of him is David, Sasha's boss and Frank's close cousin and to the right is Ashton, Frank's brother" I say quietly "They all look better in person... Especially Ash...ton" I punch her playfully "Aww ! I knew you'd like him he's super sweet too I'll do you a favor" her cheeks redden "Considering you did one for me... I listened to what you said I'm gonna try again with Frank" she gives me the sweetest smile and warmth floods over me or at least did until Sasha screams "WHATT?! , are you fucking nuts .... NO NO!" "Shut the fuck up your making a fucking scene you asshat!" She sits back down "Is everything okay , Ms. Pearce?" Prof. Marik asks "Yes" she answered "Why are you back with him?" "Because Ella's right YOLO ... And I like him I can't help that I am attracted to him." She sighs in defeat "Watch....Your....Step" she says sternly "And don't let it get past the breaking point" "I won't , thank you" "mmhmmm". Class still hasn't started and everyone jumps in fear when lighting bolt cracks it's whip in the sky making Ella and Sasha shriek in surprise and everyone laugh including me, they're such pussy. "Don't worry toots I'll protect ya" Byron turns around and says. "Byron please and I wasn't the one who shrieked" I turn to look at Ella and Sasha but I catch myself looking at Frank, he's mad and .... Is that jealousy, I see? "Oh, you know me always saving a damsel in distress" Byron adds. Sasha, Ella and I scoff and giggle. Byron is the "supreme" jock in the university (or so he says) he's really good, actually that's what he wants to pursue his career in, football. If not football he says he'll be a paramedic, he's also the salutatorian. Byron is very charming and sweet in a cute way not at all obnoxious, to my surprise. Most jocks are. He's buff and fit from all his exercise. 5'8, swift mahogany brown hair, blue eyes, skinny nose, skinny lips but it suits him. "Oh! Can you come to my party on Sunday?" Byron asks. by the way Byron throws the best parties. "Party?" Sasha and I say in unison "Oh yeah I got one, he mailed it to apartment but you guys weren't home." Ella says while pulling out a velvet purple invitation card. But.. Hold on...You guys? "Where were you, Sasha" I feel my eyebrows raise in inquisition. She bites her lip looking at David. I scoff and shake my head. "The nerve you have to talk , you cum-stain of a fucking hypocrite" I said all that with attitude. Really she needs to stop judging everyone else when she does the same exact shit, on top of that she left poor Ella alone to take care of my sister. I hear Ashton and David stifle a laugh. "Woah woah woah calm down, yes I was with-" she bows her head down to whisper "David but--" I interrupt her "And what exactly did you do?" "That's none of your business" she counter claims "Well then if that's how you feel then I don't have to tell you shit!" "Girls!" Frank and David say in unison "Shut up!" Sasha and I say in unison , then keep arguing until "JESS AND SASH" Byron screams "What" I ask aggravatingly "All I want to know is if your going or not" I look at Sasha she gives me a curt nod, I look at Ella she says "Why not?" I looks at Byron and say "Yes we'll be there uhhh" I turn to Ella , "Lemme see your invite" I look at the paper, it says
70'S and 80'S DECADE PARTY~
WHEN: SUNDAY, JUNE 15 2014
WHERE: UPPER EAST OF MANHATTAN , THADDEUS GRAND HOTEL , APARTMENT 8G
WHAT: AN 80'S AND 70'S DANCE PARTY! HOST: BYRON DANIELS
WEAR YOUR AFRO'S, GOGO BOOTS AND BELL BOTTOMS! WEAR YOUR FINGERLESS GLOVES AND SHOULDER PAD JACKETS BECAUSE...IT'S...ABOUT...TO...GO...DOWN! IT'S LIT! DRINKS , FOOD , DANCING , DON'T MISS OUT!
"Ooh Byron , I like....you guys know how much I love decade parties" "Actually, I was hoping you can be the singer or guitarist as you were for my other parties and help me pick out some songs" "Of course I WOULD LOVE TOO. How about hmm...Saturday afternoon" "Yeah that'll work" I hear Prof. Marik clear his throat "Alright , everyone settle down" "Ill text you" Byron finishes. I nod.
Prof. Marik starts his lesson about how the mind protects itself from memories , the heart doesn't want to process. "Sigmund Freud more-or-less started the whole issue about repressed memories when his clinical case studies in the late nineteenth century inspired him to develop his psychological theories about the nature of unconscious mental processes. He used the term repression to describe the way emotionally painful events could be blocked out of your conscious so that their painful effects would not have to be experienced.
Note that this repression process is a completely automatic psychological defense against emotional trauma and does not involve conscious intent. In contrast, deliberately pushing something out of awareness because you want to avoid any responsibility for it is called suppression.
Freud's theories all came together in his technique and philosophy of psychoanalysis, and repression has been a key concept within that philosophy ever since." I pay vivid attention to the subject. My therapist used to tell me the reason I'm always so happy except when I sleep is because this is the "technique" my mind uses and in all seriousness I think he was right, Marik picked up on my interest "Ms. Corerra Feldman , I have a question do you think you have an answer?" everyone's heads turned "I know I do." I answered. "What is repression?" "The action to repress something and the action of subduing someone or something by force." "Okay and in your opinion what do you think is the most plausible answer for why Freud's theory is used or mentioned in mental clinics and therapy?" I thought for a while, even though I already knew the answer. I was debating if I should say it. Then! I got my answer "In my opinion I think the most plausible answer for why his theory is still used or mentioned is because Freud's speculative theories have been taken up in the context of allegations of childhood sexual abuse; in example when an older child or adult suddenly "remembers" having been abused in childhood by some particular person, usually a parent. Your thoughts are divided here, some saying that these things happen all the time and that they reflect historically real events, while others say that recovered memories are false. Some groups even argue about the definition and reality of the mechanism of repression. It can get very ugly. But usually they are true and it's a form of sexual abuse and others including physical abuse. It's the best answer for mental illness sometimes" Prof. Marik nodded , satisfied with my answer. "Well done , Jessica, as always" he says "Thank you" I look around to see everyone giving me a thumbs up or mouthing "Good job". Even the business men look impressed, especially Frank through his jealousy that is still there and his knuckles are white from his grip on the arm rest beside him .... Ewww that's scary. 37 minutes later the class ends "Your homework will be posted on the school site, don't forget to check it out!" Prof. Marik says. "Anyone for Starbucks?" Sasha asks while walking out with Ella and I. "I'm still mad at you ... But caffeine is what I need, to get through this meeting" "Well , good for you your wearing a dressy out-fit, but not too dressy" We pull out our umbrellas and head to the closest Starbucks.
I part my way with Ella and Sasha to go to the meeting at 10:27am and they go to there separate second class. I enter the meeting room. An oval sandy brown table in the middle and a bunch of leather brown rotating chairs around it. With framed diplomas and pictures of old students or student activities on the cerulean wall. "Glad you could make it, Jessica." Dean. Jasper says. That's stupid to say obviously I have to come but instead I say "Pleasures mine" I reply, that's when I notice my accent is quite thick after that frap. He explains what type of questions they will ask me, what I'm obliged to show them and that everything will be monitored then he quietly shuts the door. I look around to see a wide range variety of business men , who don't intimidate me because I'm richer than 3/4 of the men in here or tied. But still it's a lot.
"So gentleman if I may start, what would you like to know" they all start to whisper to each other, I look to Frank who's not even acknowledging my presence, is he really that mad that I was teasing him or that I was talking to Byron? He's impassive except for his greener than my eyes envy. Then Mr. Pullmans voice was an abrupt intrusion to my thoughts as he said "We want to see what makes you worthy of being valedictorian this year. What makes people look at you and aim to achieve like you have." I see he scanned me looking at my cherry blossom flower tattoo on my right hand and my many piercings. But I didn't care my tattoos don't say who I am in a working manner. In a creative yes, you can say I'm finally going to be that blossoming woman I hoped to be when I graduate but other than that piercings are piercings, flowers are flowers. Im getting pissed of by the minute they're endless whispering and eyeing me like I'm in the wrong place at the wrong time so you know what, I pull out my portfolio. It shows all of my work, my best work. I pass it to Pullman. "Looking at me won't show you who I am or what I'm capable of. I could be naked there would be no indifference , no diversity of me and the next naked women out there. But those papers , they show who I am and what I'm capable of. But let me tell you anyway , I am a woman with the IQ of 206. I know at least 14 languages if not more. For my thick accent I'm very good at English. I am an excellent math-matician . I know how to play piano , guitar and drums ... So I am in the schools glee club, the drama club also the French club, the book club, the art club, you name it I'm there cause that's what a worthy valedictorian like me would do. I participate in my community. Yes I am a tattoo artist , but it has always been my dream job and I achieved it. Don't sit there and scan me and say She's has tattoos and piercings why should I give the school money and provide for the school with a role model like her? Cause in all honesty I might be the best role model there is cause while I work and work I still have time for creativity and imagination and fun! So while you think about who wants to pay the highest, just know I was born in Germany , moved to Spain went around the whole fucking globe, didn't have the easiest life but then made it here in America, in New York and I am going to graduate with high standards in one of the best universities, because of this" I tap the side of my head lightly. "Also the person who does pay will always have a high gratitude from me not because you believe in my work or like but that you'll be giving future generations better resources." I get up from my seat "It was nice meeting all of you and seeing all of you, also speaking with all of you." I give everyone a second of my eye contact so they know I'm serious, not caring about they're judgement or surprise. With that said I leave to go to my second class, glad that that was over with.

Just to say the information I used for Jessica's lesson in Professors Marik's class was info I got from the Internet but I did try to put it in my own words. Also please comment more guys I would love to know what your thinking.