Silverwing's Omen

Chapter 19

Silverwing didn't know how long she'd stayed next to the tree. Frankly, she didn't really care. She didn't know if there was anything she truly cared about anymore.

Well, what about the rest of RiverClan? A voice inside her challenged.

Silverwing shook her head. What was the point of serving RiverClan now? She was a half-Clan. No one trusted cats with mixed blood. Silverwing knew her Clanmates would certainly look at her differently if they found out.

If they found out...

What if they didn't find out? Would they still be able to continue believing the lie about Silverwing's parents?

Maybe they would.

Silverwing let out a cold laugh. That still doesn't change the fact that they were lied to. It's too late. The damage has already been done. They just haven't noticed yet.

A rush of sadness washed over her heart as those thoughts came to her mind. I wonder if they'll ever know.

But by then I'll already be long gone.

Silverwing stood up. She had made up her mind. She knew she couldn't stay in RiverClan anymore, knowing what she knew.

All those moons of dreaming of becoming the most respected warrior in the Clan, the wonderings of if she would become deputy, or maybe even leader. The memories of pretending to be the leader and the deputy with her sisters started to cloud her brain. Nostalgia gripped her so tightly she briefly struggled to stand up.

"Run, Silverkit! The warriors of ShadowClan are coming!"

"Ack! Help me! I'm trapped!"

"Never fear, for, uh, Miststar, the brave and courageous leader of RiverClan is coming to save the day!"

"Mistkit, leaders don't stutter or stumble on their words!"

"Haha, but one day I'll be the leader of RiverClan, and I'll never stumble on any of my words ever again!"

"No, I'm going to be leader! Grassstar sounds way better anyways."

"No it doesn't!"

"Silverkit, why are you staring at the medicine den again?"

A pang of sadness stabbed Silverwing's heart. How could she leave her sisters? They did nothing wrong, so would it be fair if Silverwing hurt them by leaving?

Maybe I'll stay for a while, just to be with them. Silverwing thought.

But, how can I live like this anymore? My life has been a lie. I'm not the cat I thought I was.

What do I do now?

Silverwing sighed, letting her paws lead the way. She ended up heading back to RiverClan territory, remembering that she had promised Whitefeather she'd be going on the afternoon patrol. She remembered how she was so eager to join the patrol earlier that day, determined to live up to her own expectations of being the best warrior ever. That memory seemed so far away, as if it had happened moons ago. It was hard to believe things had changed so quickly in just a couple of hours.

Back at camp, cats were already beginning to shoot her suspicious glances. Silverwing hadn't been in the mood to explain when Pinetail questioned her about where she had been, giving them only the slightest of shrugs before following Leafshine and Branchpaw out of camp.

Silverwing's eyes landed on Branchpaw. Should she take Seedpaw with her, too? He hadn't gone anywhere today. As much as she didn't feel like calling for her apprentice, Silverwing yowled out his name anyways, flicking her tail, beckoning her over to where she was standing.