love me more <3

chapter 27

*two weeks later*

"that's terrible" i said and ally started to laugh at me. "bro you don't like anything do you?" she was half right, i liked stuff just not the stuff she suggested

"how about this one?" she pulled up a picture of a pair of shoes, heels to be precise and i just looked at them. i wasn't sure what i was to be looking for because i really didn't wear stuff like that

"it's okay i guess" i shrugged my shoulders while biting my lip as i tilted my head a bit trying to get a better understanding of why someone would want to wear those

"ughh you're no help" ally groaned crashing on her bed beside me which made me laugh. ally knew that i wasn't into all that girly stuff but she kept trying anyway and i should hand it to her, she's been quite persistent.

ally got up from the bed and walked over to her mirror which was just in front of me, "wassup with you and aiden?" i understood the question but i didn't know how to respond

"what you mean?" aiden and i had just been texting back and forth, nothing big or interesting and some days we would go hours without speaking so it really wasn't much

"we talk" i said spinning in her chair

"you talk?, that's it?" this is the part of ally that i can't stand. once she got a hold of an idea she wouldn't stop piercing you with questions

"yup thats it. just talk" i wasn't even sure myself what it was and i wasn't going to press anything, what happens happens.

cutting our conversation short ally's phone began to ring and i leaned over to see who it was, "your husband's calling ma'am" i teased and she stuck her tongue out before grabbing her phone and exiting the room.

i began to play around in ally's room for a while before i heard her door open again and i watched as she returned to the room. "what was that about?" i asked jumping on her bed not looking at her

"nothing. just a regular call" i looked at her and saw the way she smiled nervously but i just brushed it off , i wouldn't pressure her with questions so i left it.

"what're you doing today?" she asked and i stopped mid jump to answer her

"hmm wasn't thinking of anything i'll probably just go back home and relax or something" i climbed off of her bed and went to sit in the chair from earlier. i grabbed a water bottle that was set down beside me and twisted the cap open taking a sip

ally went to her bed and sat at the edge, "how do you know when you love someone" she asked with her voice filled with admiration.

i spat out the water that i had been drinking almost soaking my tights, "what?" i snapped my neck to look at her "you're in love?, with who?" after my words got a moment to settle in i mentally slapped myself for not knowing who

"oh" i mouthed to her and she nodded. a weird silence had filled the room and i completely forgot about her question for a second

i had to shake myself up before i answered. "i'm the wrong person to ask that" i said taking another sip of the water since my first mouthful didn't make it far

"it's a feeling that i wish i could describe to you, it's like you see yourself in someone else. you want nothing but them and even when you think you've had enough you find yourself wanting more" she explained as i watched her kick her legs on the bed

this bitch is completely gone. i snapped my fingers in front of her face to make sure she was still here and she jumped after realizing what i was doing

"sorry" she said softly and i sat back in the chair. "i can't tell you how you know when you're in love or when you love someone because a lot people feel it differently, plus i've never been in love so i'm the wrong candidate sweetheart" i said and i heard her giggle

i've seen people fall in love all around me, i grew up with parents who were already married before i was born and i guess being around them gave me an idea of what love is but i'd still have to find it for myself.

could i possibly find love with aiden? i'm not doubting the thought but it would be something that would take time and i'm ready for it.

after a long conversation with ally about different things, somewhere between us laughing at the names we came up with for our babies and me teasing ally because she kept the rose for so long even when it died she refused to leave it alone i was beginning to feel a bit tired and decided that it was time to leave.

after saying bye to ally i turned to walk out of her house, i really don't know how she does it with four brothers. everywhere you turn someone's screaming at something or throwing a random object around like a football.

upon reaching near the front door i met up with ally's mom, we had a slight conversation and i left their house keeping my phone in my hands as i placed both hands in my hoodie for warmth.

i got home quickly and opened the door carefully scanning the room to see if anyone was home. both of my parents were working today but i wasn't completely sure about their hours and when they'd get off. my sister had her own apartment so she was hardly home anyway

making sure to close the door i made my way upstairs passing by julius "something wrong?" he asked with a caring expression evident on his face

"i'm fine" i responded before walking off. i was just about to turn the knob on my room door when an idea hit me

"hey Julius you need some help?" i jogged over to where he was on the staircase, i hated seeing him do so much unnecessary work and i would always volunteer to help when i could.

"your help is always greatly appreciated" i loved hearing julius talk, his accent was heavy and hadn't changed one bit ever since i've known him.

i followed Julius into the kitchen and helped him with the dishes, i got myself a kitchen towel and sprayed the counter with light chemicals before wiping it carefully. julius took the garbage out and i finished up the dishes that were in the sink.

overall we had gotten a fair amount of work done and even if he didn't say it i knew that he really needed the help.

"thanksgiving's coming up" i heard julius mention to me as i packed away a few groceries that he had bought earlier. "i know, planning on going back to england for a bit?" i asked him and he looked at me

i didn't know of any extended or immediate family that he might have, as far as i knew his wife passed years ago i've only seen her in pictures that he showed me and he had two children who he hardly got to see. i couldn't help but feel sorry for him.

"you don't have to answer that" i scolded myself internally for asking. "no no it's fine i was actually planning on going back to spend it with my children, i heard my daughter had a little one about two years old now and i'd love to meet her" his smile was so bright i could see that he was really looking forward to this and the thought of julius being around his real family warmed my heart.

we cooked dinner and ate together sharing plates for my parents for when they got home. we had a light conversation over dinner which consisted of mainly julius dictating how he remembered living with his wife and children

i didn't know that there was so much to julius' background that i was completely unaware of. he shared a story about when he was younger and trying to win his wife's heart he used to write letters to her and sit at the door waiting for her letter to come.

listening to how highly he spoke of his wife made me realize how much he truly loved her and one could only hope to come across something like that.

we washed up after eating and i went upstairs to take a shower before opening my messages seeing a couple texts from aiden. i shot him a quick text and threw my phone on the bed

i crawled up into the space at my window and placed my knees to my chest as i looked through it taking in how pretty my backyard was as well as admiring the sunset, i stayed there sitting silently at peace.