you raise me up || harry potter

chapter 42

»»————-　song:　————-««

futari no kimochi
(the true feelings of us two)

★ from the inuyasha soundtrack ★

♢ ♢ ♢

Harry awoke with a gasp, his heart painfully thumping in his chest. It took him a few seconds to gather his bearings.

Not again, he thought, falling back into his pillows with a groan. What time was it? It couldn't be earlier than four A.M., judging by how dark it was when he peeked through the curtains of his four poster bed. The moon was still bright and hung overhead. 

Harry debated between sneaking down into the kitchens with his Invisibility Cloak and trying to go back to sleep. He felt a bit nauseous still, and probably couldn't stomach much more than some pumpkin juice, but it sounded better than staying in bed and tossing and turning all night. But just as he swung his feet out of bed, a small voice came from his right.

"Harry?"

Draco's pale face peeked out from his bed, illuminated by a sliver of moonlight. "Where are you going?"

Harry had never told Draco about his Invisibility Cloak. For some reason, he wanted to keep that to himself. "I was going to go sit down in the common room," he lied. And then an embarrassing thought occurred to him. "I didn't... wake you up, did I?" he asked, worried if he had somehow screamed out loud in his sleep.

"No," Draco said. "Why?" Realization dawned on his face. 

Harry swallowed. But Draco seemed to understand that Harry didn't want to talk about it, and didn't press him further. He got out of bed to follow Harry down into the common room.

They sat together on one of the sofas, silently looking into the flames. Harry tried not to look in the direction of the windows—at night, the water was a terrifying expanse of blackness. A shiver ran up his spine.

Draco looked at him, concerned. "Are you cold?" he asked.

"No," Harry said. They lapsed into silence again.

"I've been meaning to ask you," Draco said quietly. "Why did you faint on the train that time? You never said."

Harry stared into the fire. He hadn't told anyone about that except Lupin, and Lupin for some reason seemed to understand. He didn't think Draco would, somehow.

When he had come to, Draco, Pansy and Blaise were all looking over him in concern, but also with a little bit of apprehension. 

"You guys didn't...?" he had asked hesitantly.

Pansy had shaken her head. "None of us fainted," she had said quietly. "Are you... alright?"

Harry was most definitely not alright. But he had just nodded and didn't say another word about it, no matter how hard Draco had pressed him.

"I don't know," he lied again. "Guess I was just being a weirdo, as usual."

Draco didn't laugh. "Did you have a nightmare?" he asked bluntly.

Harry nodded.

"About...?"

Where to start? They were different every night. Tonight it had been the dementors and his parents. Last night, it had been Sirius Black, coming to kill Harry in his sleep. The night before that, it was a basilisk. 

Harry shrugged. "They're always different," he said.

"You have nightmares every night?" Draco said in shock. "Harry, why didn't you tell me?"