Terrible Things || muke || malum

out of time

"Please marry me, Luke." Michael whispered, his doe eyes like a green ocean. They'd been laying together for hours (now 1:13 a.m.) soaking in each other's appearances and thoughts. Michael thought he knew what Luke was thinking of. Luke eally did know what Michael thinking of and when Michael asked the question again, Luke's assumption was correct.

"Please don't ask me that, Michael, please."

"Why not? If you love me like you say -- said-- you would. You wouldn't hesitate."

"Because it would be for the wrong reason. I'm not ready for marriage. You're not either. I don't want you to have to say that you're a widower once I die." Luke explained. The deep him of his voice still sounded the same. That's one thing that never changed with the chemo and the cancer -- his voice was still as rough and sensual as when the two first met.

"You don't know what I'm ready for." Michael tried to let Luke see that he was fine, but in honesty Michael was like a broken gift. So pretty and wrapped and well put together on the outside, but on the inside was a broken present.

"If you were ready for marriage, you would've asked before we knew I was sick. Michael, I just wish that you would understand that we can'tgetmarried." Luke sounded like the biggest ass on the planet, maybe in the universe, and he knew it too, but this was for Michael's protection. Marriage would just make everything worse when he died. In the future when Michael dated again he would have to explain a dead, diseased and assholish husband.

Michael's bloodshot eyes darted back and forth between Luke's and he hasn't stopped crying since he arrived earlier. Luke tried his best to hold on for the green eyed boy, but Michael was just tearing Luke apart with every single syllable out of his stupidly, pretty mo-- "I just wish it was me instead of you."

"Don't talk like that." Luke said, his eyes stern.

"What? It's true. If I was the sick one, I wouldn't have given up so easily. Given up on us. I would've fought until the devil had to drag me out of this goddam place, foryou. But you don't seem to care."

Luke reallyhated drunk Michael.

"I do care. That's why we're not marrying. That's why I didn't tell you about my life expectancy. I tried to spare you from the pain and I just let it build up on my shoulders. Well guess what, Michael. I'm crumbling. I can't hold the weight of the world, forever, by myself."

Michael pictured Atlas, a Greek god that was cursed to hold the world on his shoulders for eternity on his own.

"I know you're thinking about Atlas, you dork." Luke chuckled, realizyping this because Michael hadn't replied.

Michael looked at Luke's lips. "I know you're not Atlas. But, I could've been if you'd told me."

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Out Of Time - A Day To Remember

playinghalo 4 bcI'mabadassbitch

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