my hospital love affair M.C.

crappy Christmas

Months have gone by since I first came to the ALTW. 22 weeks to be exact. Now its 22nd of December only a few days till Christmas.

Since the last event in my hospital life its been Michaels birthday. I got him a watch (well cass did but i paid) We all celebrated. But I did hear Michael tell luke he likes me so I was over the moon.

Alot of the people who aren't on critical care if they live in the UK they go home and come back after so they can have the best Christmas they can in the situations their in. People from other countries stay in the parent houses with their families or in the hospital.

Im the percentage of the kids who dont go home. My parents say their 'snowed under' so I can't go home. But Michaels mum wants him to stay in the hospital to get the care he needs but shes here all day make sure he has a rememaral Christmas.

On Christmas night theres going to be a party for the people who are stuck in the perfect place to die. Dinner, presents and care but its not only me and Michael its mia, Des (my little nickname for destiny), hannah, calum and luke. Ashton is staying with his family in the parents house but hes coming to see us all, later on hes coming to the party with his siblings, which is really sweet....but thats Ashton I guess

Cass works on Christmas so its just us I guess.

To be honest I really don't want to go home. Not for Christmas.

Christmas for me consists of pain, hunger, silent tears, acting fake and abuse. My farther really is a dick.

right now im sat in the social room. The social room is a big room painting sunshine yellow. With blue sofas, a tv, xbox, music stuff I.e. drums, guitars, microphones, recording stuff, movies. All the things that can cheer a sick kid up. This is where the party is being held...with special guests. It's probably just going to be the nurses dressed as characters from Frozen again.

Im just sat alone strumming a slightly out of tune guitar. I haven't seen my parents in months, which is a good thing I can't be bothered with their bullshit.

I do play guitar but not a lot I can't sing or write very good music so I just strum my guitar

It's been a week since I had a cat scan. I should get my results sometime soon I hope...

- Christmas eve-

Michael prov

The ward seems empty theres only like 10 of us here. Sam, me, cal, luke, des, mia, hannah, Jackson, Lewis and rose... and ash but only partially

I can't believe they're gonna let us play at the Christmas dinner party thing

Our little band 5 seconds of summer is literally all we got in England.

Little droplets of snow falling past the window as we rehears our songs for the party

Little songs we wrote together the ones I wrote were mostly about sam. Were singing 5 songs then that's it

Out of my limit

Good girls

English love affair

End up here

I miss you- blink 182 cover

Im so excited to preform, im more exited to see the look on sams face when we preform English love affair. Mums so excited to see us shes spent time with me when I was writing so Im exciting for her to see the end product!

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Samanthas prov

It's only like 7 at night and iv been called into the doctors office with cass