The Fourth wall breaking of DEADPOOL meets JANE AUSTEN meets MAGICAL WEIRDNESS
When a mysterious new boy comes to town, seventeen-year-old odd ball, Peneloper Auttsley, must confront the secrets of her past in order to save her present.
...
Peneloper gets up that Friday in good spirits, determined more than ever to explain the inexplicable existence of Crispen Heavensley. She's removed herself from bed, refusing the temptation to monologue in front of her mirror-thwarting the trappings of her genre with ease-and has thrown on the nearest pair of jeans and t-shirt.
She feeds crumpled, incomplete assignments to her book bag, hoping the bag to be of the devouring sort (of which it is not) before grabbing her doorknob at the behest of a mother's screeching. She does not brush her hair or put on makeup. In her opinion, extra time is best utilized shirking responsibility or writing stories, the latter of which she is passionate about.
Plush carpeting from the hallway molds to her feet as she shuffles past three doors - a shared bathroom, her mother's bedroom, closed tight, her sister's, slightly ajar, and screaming of Pepto Bismol pink. Such a glimpse upsets her stomach.
Finally, Peneloper makes it to the steps, wherein she fidgets with the wrinkles of her shirt (a fruitless endeavor always) and, taking them one at a time, ambles into the next chapter.
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•Jesus He Knows Me•
Her sister, Carmichelle, sat at the kitchen table, texting her friends between inhales of cocoa puffs. Mother Auttsley lounged in the living room sipping on a mug of coffee in the sanctuary that was the dimly lit den. No one was to disturb her, as distraction-free mornings were observed in the Auttsley household as others might observe the Sabbath.
Peneloper went for the cupboard, grabbed the half-empty box of Captain Crunch from the pantry, scooped up a clean bowl, avoided all unpleasant altercation with the microwave, and headed toward the table.
She took a seat opposite her sister, who had not stopped typing away since Peneloper's big toe had touched down on first square of checked linoleum. After pouring herself breakfast, Peneloper pushed the bowl aside, waiting for her Captain Crunch to morph into Captain Sog and placed her head in her hand.
Perhaps it was the blur of this movement that caught Carmichelle's attention, or she was waiting for a response and found she had nothing better to do without it, but whatever had or hadn't happened, prompted the youngest Auttsley to say, "Nells, how's the Captain?"
The sound of Carmichelle's voice, neither shrill, whiny or glum, came as a surprise to Peneloper, but was a welcomed one, as Carmichelle had recently turned thirteen and obtained a cellphone, and conversing among the pair had grown stale and fleeting. Her time was not unlimited, however, and Carmichelle made certain to remind Peneloper of that with an irritated thump of foot against floor.
Peneloper took up her spoon, dug it into her mush of purple cereal, and replied, "Stormholden's good, Car. The Scarlet Reef has him all up in arms."
"Oh!" The youngest Auttsley's eyes blazed with genuine intrigue. A ball of pride lodged itself in Peneloper's throat. Quickly, she swallowed it down along with another heap of soggy cereal though she was glad a story of hers could inspire such fandom, even if it were a fandom of one. "I love The Scarlet Reef! I hope she and Cap end up together. When will I get to read the latest?"
