today marks 7 months since I got pregnant. and in 2 days it'll mark 4 months of me and Hyunjin dating. these past 3 months have been a blast, Hyunjin always came over when they had a break from practice. his bandmates freaked when they found out I was pregnant
Minho and Jisung kept fighting over whether I should name the baby after themselves if it was a boy.
Chan, on the other hand, was really proud of me. proud that I stepped up to be a mother and a girlfriend, and that I finally told Hyunjin the truth about everything. and to be honest, I'm glad I told him too. I don't know how I would've gotten this far without him
Hyunjin's working at the company and Mia's at school, I had today off so I went to a nearby park with a little pond, I sat on the bench beside the pond and watch as the water moved as I soon got lost in thought, about the past, about all the pain, about the future and what pain might be waiting for me there
what broke me out of my thoughts was the sound of a child crying behind me. I furrow my eyebrows as I stand and spot the child, a little boy with dark hair and green eyes. he was gorgeous. I kneeled in front of the crying child
I took his small hands away from his face as he opened his eyes to look at me. he looked about 5 or 6. I hold both his hands as I quickly scan over him for cuts or bruises, thankfully I didn't see any.
"what's the matter, Love?" I asked the boys once he calmed down "I lost my mommy" he said with a sniffle. I don't know what it was, but I felt a connection with the boy, one I've never felt before. it's hard to explain, "what does she look like?" I asked the boy with sad eyes "s-she's tall and skinny, and she was wearing a-a white shirt" he said and I nodded as I stood with one of his hands still in mine.
"let's go find your mom," I said with a smile and then he smiled and he was such a handsome little boy. I don't know if it was cause he was a bit foolish, or he smiled even if he was scared, but he reminded me a lot of myself.
we walked around for about an hour and couldn't find anyone within a smiles distance that fit his description. I had one last place to go. The police station. it wasn't too far so we walked over hand in hand.
I walked in and I saw a friendly face, a smile came onto my face "Hey Danny!" I said waving, he turned towards me with a soft smile on his face as he walked towards me and I gave him a one-armed hug
"So, I found this little boy in the park alone and he lost his mother" I explained and he nodded before getting on the boys level "Hey little guy what's your name?" he asked
"Lee Gun," he said moving his hair out of his hair, now that I look at him, he had bruises and ruined clothes, there were bags under his eyes and his hair was unwashed... his name fit him so well. Gun in Korean means strong and that's exactly what he is
"What did your mother say to you before she left?" he asked assuming he was left there on purpose, "she said that I wasn't even hers, a-and that I wasn't worth it" he stuttered out, and that's when we both knew that he was alone in this world again. I looked at the child with pity.
I can't believe someone would leave such a small and helpless child in the park on his own. for anyone to use. I got on my knees as Danny was about to ask me something as he stood up. I embraced the small child, I could feel his ribs very clearly, he hasn't eaten much, he was too small, but he smiled like everything was going to be okay no matter what anyone says
his life was falling apart and I knew what that felt like, I know how scary it is to go through something like this without someone by your side to hold you through the scary nights. the tears fell as I heard Danny speak
"we all know what this means" he said softly placing a hand on my shoulder and I nodded as I pulled away "Foster care" I said softly and Gun's eyes darkened, as if screaming at me to not let him go, to hold him close till his dying breath, he was so scared and I couldn't blame him
I was filled with determinations, it showed through my eyes and I knew that I stood and looked at Danny. he sighed before waving his hand "Follow me, I can get another set started, Mia's papers are ready for you to sign anyway" he walked ahead.
I held Gun's head as I started walking, but halfway to his Gun tugged at the bottom of my clothing I turned to look at his and he was looking down
"What's the matter, hun?" I asked softly as he looked up at me with tears in his eyes "I want you to be my mommy" he said with a sniffle, I got on my knee's for the millionth time today just to hold him in my arms
"Of course I will, so please don't cry," I said with a soft smile as we separated, I wiped his tears away before standing and offering him my hand which he gladly took.
we walked into Danny's office and took a seat, the next hour was spent signing paperwork in that office. when everything was done, Danny straightened some papers out and smiled at us "you are now legally the mother of 2 beautiful children, and soon to be another" he spoke mentioning the child yet to come
"You know he looks a lot like you," he said and I looked a bit confused, I told Gun to go play with the toys I saw in the waiting room so I could talk to Danny
"Do you think he's mine?" I asked him and Danny almost choked on the coffee he was drinking "What makes you say that?" He asked recovering himself
"he's 5, 5 years ago I was still held in that mold filled room, he looks like me, and I just have this connection with him that's so hard to explain"
"Mother and son bond"
"This is what I'd imagine it'd feel like" I spoke and he nodded, understanding and following along. "I can have a DNA test done, it'll take a couple days"
"I can last a couple of days" I say with a sad smile as I got up to meet Gun outside. that night I went home with another child to support. but I didn't mind
YOU ARE READING
Depression Is Only One Word//Hyunjin X Reader
FanfictionI keep everything tucked away, all the pain I've been through, all the tears I've shed and all the desperate thoughts of suicide. but one day my worst fear came true. someone saw through my mask, for the first time ever