𝚜𝚘𝚛𝚛𝚢 | 𝖼.𝗌 𝗑 𝗃.𝗐

t̸w̸e̸l̸v̸e̸

three weeks later

after that incident, the weeks passed by in a flash. san and wooyoung spent almost every day together, either at wooyoung's apartment or at san's house - which he only shared with a small cat with whom wooyoung had pretty much fallen in love.

as the weeks passed, they continued to share cuddles and kisses but nothing ever went any further than that. wooyoung often still thought about when san had introduced him as his boyfriend and it made him feel kind of flustered inside. but he never asked san about it.

it was a saturday and both boys had a day off from work (to which wooyoung had returned a week prior). so they spent the morning - and some of the afternoon - laid in bed together watching some tv show. however, neither of them were really focusing all that much. they were so lost in each other, sharing a heated kiss almost every ten minutes and then returning to their position in which one was embraced in the other's arms.

but some time in the afternoon, while sharing a kiss, san realised that he simply didn't want to let go of wooyoung. he let his hand move from wooyoung's shoulder and wander to under his shirt. wooyoung was so thin, he could feel the sharpness of his hip bone beneath his fingers. but this didn't stop him from wanting to caress every part of the younger's body.

wooyoung could feel the change of atmosphere in the room. "sannie?" he questioned.

san hummed in response and began to kiss down the delicate skin of wooyoung's neck.

wooyoung immediately became nervous - but he couldn't deny that he loved the feeling of being touched by san.

as san reached the boy's protruding collarbone, wooyoung couldn't help but let out a small whine in response; "ahh, sannie"

"baby" san whispered. he had never called him 'baby' before, but god, it felt so right. wooyoung felt himself shiver at the word.

as san continued kissing at wooyoung's neck, he also began to slightly tug at the band of wooyoung's sweatpants wantingly.

"san... wait" wooyoung warned.

"what's wrong, baby? do you want me to stop?"

"no... no... I just-"

"I want to see what you're hiding under there, baby" san purred as he began to slip his hand below the waistband.

wooyoung immediately pulled away from san and sat up in the bed. san composed himself and took note of wooyoung's timid demeanor.

"fuck, I'm sorry, woo. I went too far; I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable". the older looked genuinely sorry.

"no! you didn't sannie, it's just..."

"are you okay, woo?" san was now concerned.

"yeah, it's just... I want you, san... it's just..."

"tell me, babe"

"I've never done this before"

san chuckled, "what, had sex with your therapist?"

"I'm a virgin, san"

there was a small pause while san took in what wooyoung was saying. "...but, changbin?"

"it never happened. we did stuff but never... I could never" tears started to appear in wooyoung's eyes while he spoke, much to san's surprise.

"woah, woah, woah, woo. please don't cry, I'm here, baby. we can talk about it"

"I just couldn't do it, san. I was too self-conscious. it made me feel sick... I cried a lot"

"let me guess - changbin wasn't very patient?"

"would you be?!" wooyoung suddenly shot back.

"woo?"

"we tried so many times, but I always failed"

san moved closer to the weeping boy and pulled him into his arms. he rubbed circles on his back to soothe his cries as he spoke; "no, he failed, woo. if he was patient and gentle with you, it would have happened. he could never have been what you needed. some people just aren't" the therapist in him explained, "all you needed was to find someone who saw just how special you were and would wait as long as you needed"

wooyoung glanced upwards to look into san's eyes, "I want to lose my virginity to you, san"

"I know, woo. you just have to tell me when you're ready, okay? there's no rush"

wooyoung wiped his tears away and tried to smile through the embarrassment he felt.

"now come on, let's go get dressed so we can enjoy our day off"

"can you just hold me for five more minutes?" wooyoung asked shyly.

san showed his dimples as he agreed, "of course, baby"

-----

that afternoon, san had suggested it might be nice for both of them to spend some time outdoors. however, he was mindful that wooyoung wouldn't want to be anywhere where there were a lot of people, so he suggested a walk in the woods.

"as long as you're not gonna kill me and leave me to rot in the forest?"

san let out a loud laugh, "damn, you got me" he joked. but wooyoung agreed to the idea, conceding that he could probably use some fresh air - and trusting that san didn't actually want to kill him in the middle of the woods.

the forest was about half an hour's drive away from town, and so san let wooyoung plug his phone into the stereo so they had some entertainment on the way. every so often, san could hear wooyoung singing along to the song and this made his heart very happy. as he listened to wooyoung sound so carefree, something occurred to him.

"woo?"

"yes?"

"if you don't mind me asking; when was the last time you cut?"

wooyoung was happy that he could answer honestly, "when you found me in the pharmacy"

a huge smile appeared on san's face, "that's what I thought, but I had to make sure"

wooyoung nodded in understanding.

"that's so great, woo" san continued, "I'm so proud of you". he reached over to rest his hand on wooyoung's leg. wooyoung himself couldn't help but smile. this must have been the first time in years he had been clean for almost a month. he hoped and prayed that nothing would happen to make him relapse into his old ways.

but that would be too good to be true.