The Other Us

Chapter 10: Everything

Staring at each other, I feel my heart racing as he just stands there a few feet away from me, looking down into my eyes and then at my lips.

I feel odd. I feel as though something like this has happened before. I've always felt a strong connection to Max and I've been in this situation before of speechlessness. However, I don't think I've ever caused him to look at me so...lost from my words.

He wanted to know. He demanded I tell him what he already knew to be true.

Everything I have ever done- I have done for him.

They way he stares at me though. It's as if he's seen a ghost. Yet...I feel that way too. I feel as if my chest is heavy and my heart is racing. I want to ask him if he feels the same way...but I stop myself. Looking down and away, I nod and leave my office. Leaving him there in his own mind with God know whatever thoughts are lingering in there.

"Moonlight, stars bright,
You are the star that I see at night,
Shining above me,
Telling me you're here,

All my dreams are far  from clear.

Here we go,
I'm lost and alone,
Dreaming of you finding me,
And bringing me me home,

The day is long and lonely,
The shadows that follow me around,
Are gone,
As I walk through this valley,

All the clouds fall from the sky,

And here we go,
I'm calling to you,
The sunshine burns me to core,
And I will always love you more,

So give up the fight
I'm here waiting,
As the day turns to night,
I'll here saving...

My love for you,

So there you go,
You found someone new,
He's more than I could ever be,
But he can never love you

More than I do"

I hear a voice singing from somewhere. I look around the oncology floor and out of the corner of my eye, I see a young man sitting on a bench and a young girl leaning against the doorway.

"That's beautiful, did you write you that? Haha, sorry. Didn't mean to scare you. I'm Helen Sharpe."

She extends her hand and he sets his guitar down. He goes over to her and shakes her hand.

"Max...Goodwin."

Rubbing my eyes, I look at my younger self and a younger Max. They both look in my direction. Shaking my head, I ignore them and I walk off towards the elevator.

I must be really tired. After everything that's happened with Valentina today and now this with Max: I am more than ready for bed and I know I'm only going crazy from it all.

***Max's POV***

I felt a heavy wave of deja vu come over me just before Helen left. They way she spoke and looked at me, I was frozen in my spot. I couldn't say anything to her. All I could do was stare off between her eyes and lips: looking for an answer or a clue as to what was going on. I heard those words from her before. I swear. I could've sworn we've gone through this or something very similar. My phone goes off and it's Alice.

Alice:

Wanna come by after work.
I made hot cocoa. From
Your last text, you seem
To need to talk about it.

Everything inside me is telling me not to go. It's telling me to go talk to Helen about what just happened. I want too- badly. I want to address what went on just then and why it all felt replayed. Instead...instead I think I'm going to go talk to Alice. Today was crazy enough as it was. I don't need to ruin Whatever thing Helen and I have at the moment by pushing her or bringing up things that didn't even happen.

Leaving Helen's office, I turn the lights off and shut the door. Making my way to the elevator, I press the button and wait.

In the corner of my eye, I see someone who looks like Helen and myself: but they're younger. They don't say anything, but just stand there staring at me. Shaking my head, I get in the elevator and ignore my tired thoughts. It's been a long day, and I don't have time to chase phantoms of the imagination.

"Is déjà vu actually the specter of false timelines that never happened but did, casting their shadows upon reality?"

              Blake Crouch

The End.