The Quiet Kids

Chapter 1 (Em)

All my life, my teachers have loved me. More so, my quietness. My polite nods, rarely asking questions, not bothering anyone.

And I've always wanted to be someone else. I've always wanted to be bubbly, outgoing, talkative. It gets very lonely living inside your own mind.

I have two friends, and one of them is my sister, so I'm not sure if that counts. Darcy is 8 years older than me, and everything that I wish I was. Sam has been my best friend since we were in daycare, and he can be quite an extrovert sometimes, too.

Everyone was kind of shocked when I started dating Jared. A perfectly cheesy romance: the quiet, geeky girl and the jock who manages to see something more in her.

At first, I was kind of honored that he chose me. Then, I started to see who he really was and what he was capable of.

Shaking off the memories, I ease out of bed and make my way down the stairs. My body still hurts from my visit to the clinic, and my head is still groggy from the sleeping pills I've been prescribed.

It's hard to sleep with all this guilt in my chest, in my mind, bubbling in my veins. I am a scarecrow stuffed with regret and guilt and sorrow.

The pills don't actually help that much. They give me weird dreams and make me foggy in the morning. The ones I take for anxiety make me a zombie. The one I take for depression is ever changing because of the side effects.

Depression and anxiety being a side effect of my mom dying.

When I make my way downstairs, I realize that my dads already gone. He's always at work, so it doesn't surprise me.

When my mom started getting sick, he began to work more hours to make up for the lack of income. Now, I was used to it.

I'm about to start making cereal when my cell phone rings. I see Sam's name on caller ID and am momentarily stunned that he's up so early.

I don't get a word of greeting in before he starts talking.

"Em, I really need you. My car won't start, and I need to be at school early to retake my chem test. Is there anyway you can pick me up?" He says in one breath.

"Sam, you really need to get that thing in the shop. This is the second time this month," I shake my head. Responsibility isn't in Sam's vocabulary.

"Yeah, I know. Can you come get me or not?"

"I'll be there in 10," I say. He thanks me and hangs up. Looks like breakfast will be taking the form of an apple and a granola bar on the ride over to Sam's.

When I get there, he has oil all over his arms, he hair is sticking haphazardly in different directions, and his pants are unzipped.

"Water bottle and tissues under the seat. Brush in my purse. Zip your pants," I say, my tone matching that of one you would use with a toddler.

"Okay, mom," Sam says, reaching under the seat.

"Anyway, me and Julia are-"

"Julia and I," I correct.

"Whatever. We're going on a date tonight, and she has a friend she wants to set you up with," Sam barely finishes his sentence before I start groaning.

"Sam, you know I don't want to-"

"Just do it, okay. You need to get out of the house. It's been two weeks," he looks genuinely worried, and I feel my stomach drop.

"Okay, fine," I agree, reluctantly.

He grins and feels around in my purse for a hair brush.

"What is this?" He asks, dangling a tampon in the air about three feet away from his face, like it might bite him.

"Nothing of use to you," I squint my eyes, holding back a laugh.

--

"Em, this is Liam. Liam, this is Em," Sam says, gesturing between the two of us.

Liam is a good looking guy. Almost 6 feet, light brown hair, plays on the soccer team. The kind of guy dad would want me to bring home. I try really hard to be interested in him, but it's just not there.

We're at some fancy restaurant with dim lighting, and I immediately want to go home.

"Just Em? Not Emily? Emma? Emilia?"

"Ah. Nope, I just go by Em," I fake a smile and shuffle into our booth. I can feel the awkwardness settling in already.

A conversation sparks up that's tired and boring before we even dive in. I think about acting sick or catching my hair on fire with one of the candles so that I'll have an excuse to leave early.

Never again will I be suckered into another one of Sam's double dates. Even before Jared, he was always trying to set me up with people. I think he secretly wants to be a matchmaker or something.

"Hello, my name is Angel, and I'll be your server today. Can I start you out with something to drink?" I hear his voice and turn my head.

I take all of him in. I wouldn't say love at first sight or anything, but it's definitely infatuation of some sort. It's not just that he's gorgeous in every sense of the word. He's intriguing. I want to know everything that there is to know about him.

"I'll have a Coke," I say sheepishly, to him. To Angel. Angel.

"Okay, so that makes 2 sweet teas, a Dr. Pepper and a Coke?" He asks, jotting it down. I bet even his handwriting is perfect.

I nod excitedly, my eyes taking in his deep eyes, perfectly messy hair and jawline. A jawline crafted by God himself.

When he turned to get our drinks, Sam passes a little piece of napkin to me.

Stare much, Em? I think you're drooling, his messy scrawl reads.

I shoot him a glare, and my face flushes.

I'm still blushing when he gets back to take our food orders, and I'm sure he must notice.

When it's my turn to order, I stammer and stutter my way through. He must think I'm a basket case.

I've never been this drawn to a person in my life. I was never one of those girls to crush on boys and keep a notebook full of doodles of their names. I think if I had known Angel back then, I would have.

"Enjoy your food," he says, seeming to make eye contact with only me.

"You too," I say back. I'm such an idiot. I want the floor to swallow me up as another blush creeps it's way onto my face.

He's polite enough not to say anything about it, but I'm sure he's laughing in his mind. He must get hit on by girls all the time who are way prettier than me. Why should he give me a second look?

Ask for his number, another napkin note from Sam urges me.

I glare at him some more.

In another life, maybe I would. But when he comes back to give us our check, the words catch in my throat and I can do nothing but stare at the table.

"I had a good time with you tonight. Can I see you again?" Liam asks when we go out to the car.

"Yeah, maybe," I fake another smile. Truth be told, I had completely forgotten he was even there.