Kiss Off ↣ jschlatt

xi: crooners and tiktok dances

milo beckman
23 may

after my shower and change of clothes, i headed back downstairs to make lunch. i hope he likes pb+j, because that's what he's getting.

i paused on the second floor, hearing a voice from the shower.

"how lucky can one guy be? i kissed her and she kissed me. like the fella once said, 'ain't that a kick in the head?'"

schlatt sang a shitty rendition of a dean martin song in the shower. while not terribly off-brand, i'd still never expect him, of all people, to be the 'singing in the shower' type.

stifling a giggle, i made a mental note to tease him about it later.

once in the kitchen, i made our sandwiches and was faced with a terrible dilemma: does he like a vertical or diagonal cut? i don't want to mess up his sandwich, what if he hates it because i cut it wrong?

what the fuck is wrong with me, he's a grown-ass man. he'll eat the damn sandwich.

creaking stairs signaled schlatt's arrival in my living room. i glanced up and felt my breath hitch in my throat.

there was nothing particularly special about the way he looked leaning against the door frame, one leg kicked out and arms crossed across his broad chest. his dark hair was still damp and tousled in basically every direction except the way he typically wore it.

"you look comfy," i remarked, noting the change in hoodie and joggers.

he laughed, glancing down at his pink hoodie and grey sweatpants.

"thanks," he walked over and leant his elbows on my kitchen island. "what'cha makin'?"

i slid his plate over to him, "pb and j, i hope you like it."

he grinned and held up one of the triangles, "you even cut it the right way!"

"why thank you!" i beamed up at him. "i pride myself on my sandwich-making abilities. nineteen years of woman-hood ought to have prepared me for this."

he playfully pushed my shoulder, "c'mon, miles," the butterflies in my stomach didn't like that one bit.

"you're worth more than your sandwich-making skills!" he paused.

"you're also good at doing housework."

"hey!" i exclaimed, pushing him back as well.

"shut up, broad. eat your lunch," schlatt gestured down at my plate.

huffing, i gave a "whatever" and began my sandwich.

"i was thinkin' while i was in the shower—"

"before or after the dino concert?" smirking, i brought up his shower singing.

cheeks pink, he stuttered out a response, "you — you heard that?"

"yeah," he's kinda cute when he's caught off guard. "i didn't record, don't worry."

he sighed in relief and continued, "okay, good, i guess. but i was thinking, could we maybe not do that 'just chatting' stream we talked about earlier? nothing against you, i'm just super tired and not really up to streaming right now."