A Court in Flames

Chapter 38

Elide's POV

Six years. I couldn't believe it. I also couldn't believe that Cal and Elentiya were the same age. Both born on Beltane.

So when Rowan had shown up three days after he'd disappeared on Beltane with a hollow look in his eyes, I couldn't help but wonder what could've possibly given him that look.

"Mum?" Cal asked me as I held him in my arms. "Where'd Uncle Rowan go?"

"I don't know, Cal. But, look it's your dad and Uncle Fen and Uncle Aedion." He smiled and I put him down before he ran into Lorcan's arms. "Cal. Why don't you find your little cousin, Rhoe?" I asked him. He smiled and ran through the doors, Gavriel and Elena chasing after him.

"They share no blood, therefore they aren't cousins," Lorcan stated.

"Please. You and Fenrys share no blood, yet you call each other brothers. Anyway, I like that they are cousins. It makes them have someone else in the world," I said and shrugged while he glared at me. "Don't give me that face. Other people can be right sometimes."

"Has anyone told Rowan, yet?" Aedion asked as he looked at us. Fenrys gave us a confused look while Lorcan and I shook our heads.

"What's going on?" Fenrys asked as he looked from Aedion to Lorcan to me.

"Well... We found out why Aelin was sick so often before she was captured and Rowan has no idea. At least he doesn't seem to have any idea," I explained. 

"How could you have figured that out? That was over six years ago! And why haven't you told Rowan?" Fenrys questioned me as I looked towards the doors of the castle.

"We haven't told Rowan because Aelin should be the one to tell him, not us. And... the reason she was so sick was because..." I didn't finish and luckily Aedion finished for me.

"She was pregnant." Fenrys gaped at us.

"You're joking. There is no way Aelin was pregnant."

"I met her daughter, so she most definitely was," I stated. He stared at us.

"And Rowan has no idea." We all nodded. He shook his head. "This is plain insane."

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Aelin's POV

I don't know how long I had lain on this bed. I don't know how long I stared at the wall. And I didn't know how to handle my pain.

I didn't know as each memory floated through my mind. The hours we'd spent training together. Dashing through the forest and watching as he flashed a wicked grin at me. Him smiling through the darkness as the Valg princes tore at me. Watching as Maeve had him whipped in front of me then kneeled in front of me when I made her release him from his blood oath to her.

A hundred thousand moments and memories. A thousand million words. 'Fireheart. To whatever end. You're mine.' And I had believed them. That he had loved me. And maybe it wasn't the fact that he didn't love me or that I cared so much what he thought. Maybe it was that he had lied to me that made me hurt so much. Maybe I would never know or move on because I was foolish and young.

Because... No matter what he had done I know I would always love him even if he had and would never love me back.

Elentiya's POV

I had watched my mother lay in bed for five days. Stared at the wall and cried. I had seen the tears falling from her eyes.

And when she had gotten up, I had felt relieved. That was until she returned mere moments later after going to the bathroom.

I scowled. What had happened that caused her to be like this? She had turned from the carefree woman I had just met into a complete mess within days. Sure I hadn't noticed it at first but now it was impossible to miss.

"Auntie Feyre?" I asked. "Why is my mom so sad?"

"I don't know. But I think she just has a lot going on and we should let her gather her thoughts." 

I considered what she had said. "Does it have to do with my dad, maybe?" I asked. 

"Probably. I think they might've had some disagreements or she lost her temper when he attacked you. Your mother's temper is infamous. But she'll come out of whatever is going on, eventually."

"I hope it's soon. I miss her and I don't like it when people are sad. It makes me sad," I told her. It also reminded me of the six years I spent with Hades and it felt as if at any moment this could all slip away and become nothing more than my imagination.

"I know, Tiya. Sometimes I wonder if all of this," She gestured with her arms to encompass the entire room. "is just a dream and I'll wake up to find myself back on the other side of the wall, where the humans live, fighting for survival." 

"Really?" I asked her. She nodded.

"Really. But... You know what I do?" She asked me.

"What?" I asked hopefully.

"I tell myself to just enjoy everything because if it is all a dream then I want to remember every moment of it. I want to know what this happiness is so that if I do go back... If I do go back then I'll know what to look for and one day... One day I'll know for sure that this is real and when I do... That is the day I will finally let go of my fear. That will be the day when I am no longer afraid."

"But what if you can't tell?" I asked her. "What if it feels so much like a dream that I can't tell?"

"Then you pinch yourself because a dream can't hurt you. Not too hard. Just enough that you know that it's real. Now, how about we go get some chocolate cake and bring some to your mom?" She said while smiling.

"Yes! Let's go! She loves chocolate cake!" I was grinning now as Auntie Feyre ran with me through the halls to the kitchens.