"Are you gonna leave me?" you say to Ashton he still hasn't let you go.
"Why would I leave you, y/n?" he says looking down at you.
"Because you have thousand of perfect girls who don't cut themselves and eat every day, and that scream your name and would stop anything and everything to be with you."
"But none of them are you," his voice was calm. His voice was like a drop of sun while you were in the middle of a storm in the ocean. He was your entire world and his voice was your sun. "I would never leave you baby, all those girls love you to you know. Whenever I go somewhere and you aren't there they ask if you're okay. They tweet about you. They stick up for you. They know how happy you make me."
"Are we gonna tell them?" You knew how much the fans meant to Ashton, they meant a lot to you too, but you were scared of what they would think of you if you told them.
"We can get there. Do you want to start by telling the boys first?" You just nodded. Ashton took your hands and looked you in the eyes "We can do this together" Then he let go of one of your hands and opened the door. The other boys were sitting on the beds. When you two came out they looked up.
That's when Michael said, "Hey, we ordered some pizzas! We got cheese and..." his voice trailed off, he must have seen that you had been crying.
"Hey is everything okay, y/n?" Calum said you knew he was starting to worry. The four boys in that room had been there for you for so long.
"No, things aren't ok. They haven't been for a long time," you looked up at Ashton then you looked at the floor. "I...I need to tell you guys something. But, I need you to promise you won't walk away."
"We could never walk away from you, your part of this family too," Micheal said. You walked over to the bed and sat down. You pulled up the sleeve of your sweater, "I'm sorry guys."
"Why would you do this, darling, you're so perfect," Luke asked you could hear the pain in his voice. It sounded like you had been cutting him this whole time and he just found out.
"Because.... my parents, all the hate on Twitter, not knowing what to feel. I... I just... I just wanted to feel something that I knew was real," you couldn't even look at the boys but you knew Ashton was next to you.
"Your parents fucked up when they kicked you out, but we're here for you. Please don't do this to yourself anymore. There's so many people that love you," Luke said, you were close to Luke, and not just because how close of age you were. He was a couple months older than you and had grown up in the house next to yours.
"Why can't I love myself though?" you said you knew you were crying again. You tried to fight it but you really couldn't.
"You just don't see what we see, and we're gonna make you. You practically have an entire album that was written about you," Calum said, he said almost laughing. You smiled a little. Michael smiled at the fact that you smiled and you knew that this is what family was it wasn't the people you had blood lines with it was the people who could make you smile even when they didn't know what you were going through.
*** a little later after the pizza arrived***
"You want some?" Ashton offered holding up a piece of pizza, you shook ur head. He frowned a little then gave you a plate with a piece of cheese pizza on it. "yeah you do." He said smiling at you. You looked at him. Then you picked up the pizza and took a bite. He smiled even bigger at you. If this is what was gonna make him happy then this is what you were gonna do. You felt sick to your stomach as soon as you swallowed that one bite. You frowned a little.
"Hey, Mikey can you hand me a water."
"Yeah sure," he said with a mouth full of pizza. Then he threw you a water. You caught it and took a sip. Just that one bite of pizza made you want to throw up. Even through this, you knew it was a start adn you didn't know if you could make it to the end.
"I love you." He whispered in your ear, then kissed your cheek. Then put his head back in the crock of your neck. "I love you, too." You whispered back. You could feel him smile, which made you smile a little, too. The rest of the guys continue to shout and yell at each other. You scrolled though your Twitter, you smiled at all the nice things the fans were saying you. One tweet said, "@ashton5sos where was @y/t/n today?! Is she ok?!?" You responded, "I stayed at the hotel while the boys were out :) I was just unpacking;)" They tweeted back "OH MY GOSH!! @Y/t/n noticed me!!!" You smiled then followed the user. You locked your phone and slid it onto the closest bed.
***** important A/N PLEASE READ ALL OF IT-
Okay, I noticed that this has an important theme to it, that is if you are a fan of someone and they are dating someone you should love them just as much because you never know what they are going though.
PLEASE TALK TO ME OR SOMEONE ELSE IF YOU ARE STRUGGLING! I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH
