FORCE | topper thornton

THIRTY

It was thanksgiving, Topper was going to answer the door for my dad while I cooked away in the kitchen, I'm not complaining, I was enjoying it, it was my first day off in a while. "Hey dad!" I smiled as he walked into the kitchen, kissing my cheek as I stirred the potatoes on the stove. "Hi honey." He smiled back at me, "anything I can do to help?" He asked but I shook my head, "no I've got it, you guys just go do whatever." I waved them off, wanting them to bond, although they're close, I really want to ensure their relationship, I glanced back as they disappeared into the living room. I smiled to myself, and continued the few things I had left to do, not much, the turkey was done, sitting in the oven to stay warm, mashed potatoes were done, stuffing was done, gravy was warming up as I stood there, green bean casserole was also done and in the oven.

I slowly walked to the living room, trying to hear their conversation, it was muffled by the TV show I shrugged and walked in, "dinners ready." I interrupted them, Topper's head whipping around to face me, my dad laughed at his reaction, "let's eat." He spoke up, standing from his spot on the couch, my dad following, I gently grabbed Toppers hand, "you okay? This is our first holidays without our moms." I whispered, my dad being out of earshot, "I know, baby, I'm alright. How are you?" He responded with a light kiss to my forehead, meeting my eyes, "I'm fine." I muttered, giving him a soft smile, he didn't fully believe me but decided not to push. We all sat around, eating way more than we should and talking about anything and everything, I don't know how neither my dad or I haven't cried, it's hard. "I'll do the dishes." Topper assured, lightly pushing me back into my seat, forcing me to stay and sit with my dad. "Do you love him? The way your mom and I were in love?" My dad asked once the water started running, covering his whispers. I stared at him, my head tilting like a confused puppy, "what?" I mumbled, why was he acting so weird. "I just want to make sure you're happy, and taken care of." He assured me, placing his hand over mine on the table, "what aren't you telling me?" I cut straight to the point, he shook his head, smiling at me, "nothing honey, just answer the question." He sighed.

"Yes, I love him, the way you and mom loved each other, with all my heart." I assured him, I could see happiness spread across his face, "that's good, I'm glad." Was all he said, beginning to change the subject. I shook it off, not wanting to stress myself out anymore today, knowing once Topper fell asleep I was surely bound to have a mini breakdown, not that I cared if he saw, sometimes I just want to cry it out in silence ya know.

***

I stared blankly at the wall beside me, wishing I could fall asleep, but I couldn't, I began to try and climb out of bed when Topper's sniffle caught my attention. "Topper?" I whispered, he rolled to face me, his eyes were a little puffy, no more tears, and my heart broke, had he been planning on doing the same thing I was. "Oh babe." I cooed, wrapping my arms around him, pulling him towards me, I was sitting up in the bed, his head resting comfortably on my lap, "I'm sorry." He muttered, looking up at me but I shook my head, not knowing I was crying until he gently wiped a tear from my cheek. "I'm sorry." I told him, and we both let out an ironic laugh, both of us apologizing for crying over our dead family on thanksgiving night. We stayed like this for a while, I was leaning against the headboard, running my fingers through his hair, he was staring up at me, and I would occasionally look down, but most of my time was spent looking out the window towards the dark ocean. "Did my dad say anything to you? He was acting a little weird tonight." I broke the silence, finally bringing up the discussion I hadn't wanted to have, Topper studied my features, trying to figure out how I felt, "no, he didn't say anything to me." He spoke, and I believed him. "Why'd you freak out when I walked into the living room then?" I asked, thinking back to when he turned so quick I thought he would've gotten whiplash. "So many questions, baby girl, it's late." Topper raised a brow, slyly changing the subject, and I didn't have the energy to protest. "I know, I know, let's go to sleep." I yawned, gently pushing him off of me, he groaned in fake pain, laughing as I curled up beside him. "Come here." He mumbled, being the one to pull me into him this time, my head resting on his chest, I turned it slightly, placing a chaste kiss to his bare skin before shutting my eyes, hoping sleep would take over me soon, Topper's hand ran through my hair, definitely speeding the process along. "I love you." He whispered as I dozed off, I muttered an incoherent I love you too, he chuckled beneath me but I was too tired to be bothered by it, so off I went sleeping my anxiety away.