Leave your lover (Sam Smith fan fiction)

Chapter 6 "Do I Want To Know?"

   When I woke the next morning, she was gone!!! I began to panic and shot out my bed. I ran to the kitchen and sure enough she was there, looking confused. I walked over to her and asked her to sit while I prepared breakfast. She looked around like she was in a new universe. It was so cute how her nose crinkled when ours eyes met.

   I was still very confused about why I was so en-captured by her but I didn't want to ruin the moment by asking unneeded questions. 

When I was done cooking I placed the plate of food in front of her with some water. She looked at me and slowly lifted her fork, when she did i could see blood dripping from her hand. I ran to her side and grabbed her hand.

"What is this?!" I demanded. She looked down and spoke for the first time without screaming. "I-I kinda .........I am so sorry i broke your mirror when I saw my face."  I looked at her and i was so upset but not because of the mirror but because she felt she had to hide an injury from me.

I wanted so bad for her to trust me and to depend on me and I couldn't figure out why. I just met her yet I'm so attached. I never felt so ........attracted to a woman.

I was so lost in my thoughts I didn't even see her jet for the bathroom. I ran for her and grabbed her before she shut the door. "She struggled and screamed at me." "Why do you care what happens to me!!!???? Your Sam Smith!"  I thought about it and all i could say was "I think i may l-love you."  

I had to stop and think I just couldn't believe what I had said. I let her go and told her my driver would take her somewhere where she would be safe.    I didn't want to hear what she had to say back. the last thing i needed was to feel heartbreak before my performance tonight.

I rehearsed all day before i left for my concert. Sold out again and i was happy but couldn't focus because i was thinking about Nila and how her eyes sparkled when i confessed my love. I wasn't sure at the time but i think i meant it.

Everything about her sends chills up my spin. She makes me smile even when she doesn't smile. I cant stand to see her hurt and that night when i held her was when i realized it all. I hadn't slept since i admitted my sexuality but i slept so good next to her.

I wonder if she feels it to. Do i even want to know?    I just got an amazing idea for my performance. "Arctic Monkeys, Do I Want To Know.?"

"Have you got colour in your cheeks?
Do you ever get that fear that you can't shift
The type that sticks around like something in your teeth?
Are there some aces up your sleeve?
Have you no idea that you're in deep?
I dreamt about you nearly every night this week
How many secrets can you keep?
'Cause there's this tune I found that makes me think of you somehow and I play it on repeat
Until I fall asleep
Spilling drinks on my settee

(Do I wanna know)
If this feeling flows both ways?
(Sad to see you go)
Was sort of hoping that you'd stay
(Baby we both know)
That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day"

Maybe this could work.   I will go find her after i put my head together......