His (BxB)

Part 18

A/N: This is like the longest chapter that I've ever written here.. Hope you enjoy it!

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I wake up to a dim-lighted and quiet surrounding. I blink my eyes a few times, trying to adapt to the minimum light. I start to inspect the foreign scenery around me. There's a whole set of TV backdrop in front of me, complete with a very big flat screen TV attached to it. I think the size should be around fifty inches plus. A clock near the door is currently showing 4.10 AM. There's no light in this room, but there's a small window glass on the door that allows small amount of lighting to get in here. And that's enough for me to tell that the size of this room is quite large. Outside that door is probably a corridor because it is so bright out there.

I guess I'm at a hospital right now, judging by the shape of the bed I lay on and a hanging IV bag beside my bed that's connected to the needle stuck on the back side of my right hand. I remember being shot last night and brought to hospital by William. He is now sleeping in a sitting position on my left. He rests his head on my bed with his hands being the support, facing me. His black hair looks a bit messy. I hold the urge to hand-comb a few strands of hair that are rebelliously spiking up on top of his head. I don't want to wake him up. He must be exhausted that he's able to sleep in such an uncomfortable position.

I take some time staring at his sleeping face, can't help admiring even. But his current face doesn't look peaceful at all. He probably has spent too much energy to feel worried sick about me. I feel a sense of comforting warmth radiating inside my chest. I feel grateful. No one has ever been so caring about me besides my parents. And he doesn't expect anything in return except for me to simply love him, which I find very easy to do. It's not difficult to love someone who's always been taking a great care of you, isn't it? I now realize that I never loved someone as much as this before. I don't even remember being in love with anyone before I met William.

I love him so much that it's starting to hurt now due to the cheating incident. It's weird because I should be feeling angry at him for what he's done with Ivan. But instead of feeling angry, I feel rather scared right now. I'm scared for I have no idea what I should do. I know I'm going to feel devastated if I decide to start to undo all my feelings for him. My heart burns just by the thoughts of it as it is so close to impossible. But still I have to swallow the bitter fact that William never loves me. Yes, I'm aware of it. I'm aware that I'm just too pathetic to be considered lovable. Anyone would prefer Ivan in a heartbeat.

I lift my left hand that isn't attached to the IV line, and bring it up to my face. I wipe the wetness on my cheeks due to occasional tears. But the more I wipe, the more my tears flow. Then a second after, series small sobs escape my lips. This is stupid. Why do I cry so easily?

"Lou?"

William suddenly awakes from his light sleep. He rises from his chair to check up on me. He fondles my hair carefully like it's a fragile object and closes his face onto mine in order to get a better view. I can see a thick layer of worry shielding his tired eyes as he finds me with tearful eyes.

"Where does it hurt, Baby? I'm calling a nurse, okay?" He whispers.

"No." I stop him from pressing the nurse call button near my bed.

"Do you want me to get your dad? I just found out that he works here when I called him last night and he's currently on duty. But your mom's not here. Your dad asked her to just come in the morning because you're still unconscious."

I shake my head, declining his offer. "No need."

Now that I feel a little bit calmer, I put my hand back down which he holds it immediately. "Do you feel any discomfort? Please tell me."