Everyone Needs A Hero

Little Reminders Everywhere - Part 2

Luke sighed as he looked for Vic. He had looked everywhere she might have been but she was good at avoiding him. Or hiding from him, whatever it was she was good at it. He hoped she hadn't been called away.
"Ripley " Andy greeted him as she walked past.
"Herrera have you seen Hughes?" He asked her becoming worried. Maybe he was too late.

"No I haven't. Haven't seen much of anyone. They don't like Kingham" Andy sighed " And they like me even less for bringing him on."
"Well for starters you shouldn't have given him Warren's locker " Luke sympathized" He'll bounce back. I think they'll be surprised"
"Yeah" Andy sighed "I hope so. And I guess I could have given him Rigo's locker instead. "
"That would have been better." Luke agreed before leaving.

Luke let go of a breath he didn't know he was holding when he found Vic lying in the bunk room.
"Hey " He greeted " You're good at hiding"
She didn't look at him just continued to stare at the ceiling from where she lay.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just didn't want you to think that I didn't care about Warren. " He apologized sitting down next to her.
He could see the stains her tears had left behind. Her face was splotchy and red. He felt a familiar twang in his heart.
"Vic I really am sorry " He sighed grabbing her hand. To his surprise she didn't pull away.
"You can't do that. " She sighed " You can't just not tell me things. I don't trust you when you do that. And I want to trust you because you're my husband."
Luke nodded " I know and I'm sorry."
"And you can't not text. You have to text even if I yell, even if you yell. Because I can't focus at work if I don't know you're okay. " Vic said tearfully " And I'm sorry. I'm really sorry for the things I said "
"It's okay Vic I understand" Luke told her" I love you and I want you to trust me. And I'll text from now on so you know I'm safe."
"I thought you were going to leave me." Vic cried " That I would just come home and you wouldn't be there. "
"Hey " Luke whispered squeezing her hand " When I said I was in this I meant it. I'm never going to leave you"
Vic nodded and sat up. She leaned into his chest and let out her tears.
"I miss him " She admitted " More than I thought."
"I know " Luke whispered. He rubbed her back gently.
"I'm not ready to let go" Vic said quietly "I'm not ready to move on. I'm not ready for someone new.".
Luke nodded gently stroking the top of her head" I know and I wish we could have waited but the way 19 was going"
"We would have lost someone I know " Vic finished " I'm a firefighter too you know "
"He just reminds me of how little time I actually have with you " Vic confessed quietly" I could die or you could die. And I don't know how to deal with it."
"Well for starters you talk to people " Luke explained " It doesn't have to be me. Someone you trust. You talk to people about it. And you just enjoy what you can while you have it. Live in the now not the after. "
Vic nodded and wiped the tears from her eyes.
"And you do what you do"Luke continued"You go to work you save lives and at the end of the day you come home to me "
Vic nodded and wrapped her arms around him.
"So have I been forgiven?" Luke whispered in her ear.
"Yeah" Vic whispered and let his heartbeat calm her own.

July let out a breath to ground himself as he stepped into the barn where Miller was working on his chores.
"You mind if I help ?" He asked as he walked up gesturing to the work.
Dean didn't say anything just kept at it. Hoping that if he ignored the guy long enough he'd walk away.
"Look man I shouldn't have acted like that earlier. " July confronted him bending down to help anyway. " I get that you guys lost a friend. I wasn't trying to. "
Dean just kept working. There wasn't anything he could say to the new motorcycle riding hire. Not after the way he acted that morning.
"I was an ass. I do that. I'm not great with people and I make an ass out of myself" July sighed " And I didn't mean any disrespect towards Warren or Vasquez."
"Well they're dead Kingham " Dean snapped coldly " Not like you can disrespect them "
"Yeah " July sighed "yeah I know. I just meant that I wasn't trying to be inconsiderate. I know you're all grieving"
Dean sighed remembering what Ripley had said. Knowing that truthfully Andy and Sullivan had both given them plenty of time to grieve before bringing in someone new. He also knew Andy likely had come to this idea reluctantly.
"I'm not trying to replace Warren." July continued " And I respect the hell out of him. He died a hero. "
"He didn't just die a hero. " Dean corrected " Every day he was a hero. He was different. Not cut from the same cloth as the rest of us. But he was a freaking hero and you're"
"A bike riding adrenaline enthusiast?" July guessed remembering the team's initial reactions to him. The things they had said being mostly true.
"Yeah " Dean replied picking up his clipboard and marking off a few things.
"I get it." July told him" I'm nothing like the guy you lost. "
"No you're not. " Dean confirmed quietly "Warren's wife would have killed him if he ever bought a bike. And he certainly wasn't in it for the adrenaline. "
"I'm not just in it for the adrenaline." July clarified" I do crave it but not from the job. The job for me it's about doing something right."
Dean looked at the guy seeing him differently than when he had first walked in. " That's not what my colleagues think "
" I'm a little daring on the job sometimes. And I was reckless in the beginning. " July explained" but I've grown up a lot since my rookie days. I've been through the thick of it like you."
"The thick of it ?" Dean asked not knowing what he meant.
"I've been in tough situations. Fighting fires isn't all glory "
"It certainly isn't " Dean agreed " Finish this and then come find me after. You can help wash the truck."
"I met him " July admitted hoping for a truce" Warren. A fire a couple months back got out of hand. They sent you guys to help. He was good "
Dean nodded " You mind if I ask a question?"
"I ride because it allows me to let go." July answered " I don't like to bring work home with me and riding gives me that release."