I woke up with a swollen eyes that morning. Alas singko palang pala. Dali dali akong bumangon at lumabas ng kwarto at naligo. Hinanda ko na lahat ng gamit ko. 6:30 na yun ng lumabas na ako para umalis. I saw my mom siting at the table with a money in her hand.
"Ito na baon mo." She coldly said so i just get it and go out the house. Fck it!
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"SO GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT OF MY HEAD AND FALL INTO MY ARMS INSTEAD!" Sigaw na ako ng sigaw ngayon. Time check its already 8 P.M. at nasa school pa ako. I dont mind nag paalam naman ako kay mama na gabi na ako makakauwi at ayoko pang umuwi.
This day is perfect! I am so happy! Its my first time having a nightout with my friends and even though dito lang sa school worth it pa rin naman. Sa sobrang saya ko ay hindi ko na namalayan ang orasan. Napatingin lang ulit ako ng maramdamang nag vibrate ang phone ko.
Oh shit! Its already 11:30 PM. Naka 50 missed calls si mama at 25 missed calls naman si tita. I receive 105 messages from mama at 70 messages naman from tita. What the fuck is happening?!
Nagmamadali kaming umuwi ng mga kaibigan ko since lagot kaming lahat dahil late na kaming umuwi. Fck! Fck! Fck! Mas lalo akong kinabahan ng makitang low bat na phone ko! My gosh! Natagalan kami kakahintay ng masasaktan kaya 12:00 na ako nakauwi ng bahay.
Nagulat na lamang ako na ang andaming tao sa labas. Whats happening? Kahit pagod na ang katawan ko ay tinakbo ko ang loob ng bahay and then... i saw my aunt hugging the lifeless body of my mom. What... the... hell?! Dali dali akong lumapit sakaniya at pilit na ginigising siya.
"Ma?! Ma?! Maaa gumising ka ma! Ma! I didnt mean to say those words kagabi! Maa! Please! Ma!!" I cried and cried as i hug her body. My aunt hug me too but i just canr stop from crying... why?!?why?! Why?!
"Binaril ang mama mo Cess... it was already 9:30 that time. Nagaalala na siya kaya inutusan niya akong sunduin ka. Hindi pa ako nakakalayo ng makarinig ako ng putok ng baril mula sa bahay kaya imbes na puntahan ka ay bumalik ako. Nakita ko na ang duguang katawan ng iyong ina habang yakap yakap ang bagong selpon na hinihiling mo.." napatigil siya sa pag kwe kwento at umiyak. She bought me a new... phone?
Pinakita sakin ni tita ang bagong cellphone nga. Its my dream phone. So all this time? My mom was saving to buy me a new phone? Thats why....
"Sabi niya gusto niya daw bumawi sayo... kaya hindi ka niya binibigyan ng munting pinapabili mo kasi gusto niya bongga. Siguro pinilit kunin ng magnanakaw ang selpon pero pinotrektahan ito ng iyong ina kaya siya binaril..." patuloy niya sa pag kwento. I keep on shaking my head hoping that this is just a dream... but its not.
"Asan si Marryl?!" Natatarantang sabi ko. Pinakalma ako ni tita bago siya sumagot. "Good thing na sa loob siya ng kwarto mo that time kaya hindi siya nakita ng magnanakaw." Sagot niya kaya napahinga naman ako ng maluwag. But tears are still flowing and i cant stop it!
"Asan na ang magnanakaw?" Galit na sabi ko. "Hinabol siya ng tiyo Lester mo at nadakip na. andon na sila ngayon sa presinto." Mabuti naman kung ganun. I will never forgive who did this to my mom. Never.
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"Si Mae... isa siyang mabuting kaibigan. Everytime na kailangan ko siya andiyan siya kaagad. Si Mae... isa siyang malakas na tao. In my whole life i never see her crying because of money or problems. Kapag nga hindi mo talaga siya gaano ka kilala masasabi mo na na ang sarap ng buhay niya." Sabi ni Tiya Angeline kaya naman mas lalo akong napaiyak. Today is the last of my mom in this world. Ihahatid na namin siya sa kaniyang huling hantungan.
"Pero... ng malaman ko ang takbo ng buhay niya. Napahanga ako sakaniya. She always laugh. Masaya o malungkot man siya. Yes she's loud maingay siya. Palaaway sabi ng kaaway nila but the truth is she's really kind. She always prioritize her family before her self. So... Mae... wherever are you now. I know your happy. You will forever in our heart Mae." Ang huling sabi niya bago binigay sakin ang mikropono.
I take a deep sigh before i dried my tears and look everyone in front. I smile a little before i started speaking. "I remember... noon kapag nagkakasakit ako... i thought my mom doesn't care for me. Akala ko wala siyang pakealam... but little do i know she's always staying up late just to check my temparature. I... i am so selfish that i forget all of she have done to me... to us. All of her sacrifices. All of her time. Everything she have. She gave it us. I saw how she cried when my father died but still she managed to smile infront of us assuring that she's okay." I stop and take a deep breathe before i continue. Its hard to stop my tears. Parang may nakabara sa lalamunan ko.
"After my father's death... i never see her cried again. Never. Thats why i thought she's okay. I became selfish again. Until one night... before her death... i... selfishly ask na sana sana hindi nalang siya ng mama ko. Na sana siya nalang ang nawala at hindi si papa. I regret it. God knows how much i regret it... but its too late. Its too late to tell her how much i love her. How much i miss her. How much i appreciated her.
"Ma... nasaan kaman ngayon... i hope na magkasama na kayo ni papa. I learn my lesson ma. Aalagaan ko na ang kapatid ko. Mamahalin ko na siya gaya ng pagmamahal mo sa amin. Ma... i love you so much... im sorry for everything... may you rest in peace ma." I said and cried and cried.
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I hug my sister as we watch together the white baloons flying in the ear. "Manang? Saan pupunta si mama?kailan ko siya makikita ulit?" Tanong ko kaya naman i smiled a little. "Mar... andon na siya kasama si papa. They will leave happily every after in His place. When we will see them again? Someday mar.. someday."
I said and hug her tighter and then i look up in the sky. I saw how the sun gets down and i suddenly remember what my english teacher told us once: You will only notices someone elses worth if they are already gone.
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Hiiiii to those who followed me in my Fb acc(Kianne zhyx) thankkkk youuu so much. Please continue supporting me there i love you alll
