Distant Memories

Dear Diary (14)

Ito ang aking panghihinayang...

  

   

   

  

  

  

You must have realized it too...

Opo. Ang dami kong 'if only'. Ang dami kong regrets. And as you keep on reading this story, andami nyo rin makikitang holes.

Makikita nyo kung paano ko palipasin ang panahon. Makikita nyo kung paano ko pakawalan ang mga chances and opportunities na meron ako. The saying is right. "Nasa huli ang pagsisisi."

Makikita nyo rin kung gaano ako ka duwag.

Ang dami kong hindi ginawa. Kaya naman eto, wala rin akong napala. I have no one to blame but myself and only myself.

If only I've known, he will be someone more than just that.

Kung sana lang, nung mga oras na yun, di ako kinain ng hiya.

If only I talked to him even more. If only I didn't let it end with just that.

Malay ko bang yun ang magiging simula ng lahat.

If only I didn't realize that...

If only I didn't feel that...

If only I didn't let myself fall for him.

If only he knew just how much he can make me happy with little to no effort at all...

If only he knew what I feel for him...

If only he knew that I am inlove with him...

If there's only a chance for us to be together, I would like to grab it.

If only I know, that will be the last time we will be personally meeting each other.

If only I know, that is my last string of hope.

If only I was able to tell him how I feel...

If only I confessed to him when I had the chance...

Will things change?

If only I can meet him now and confirm my feelings...

Wala nang saysay kung patuloy pa akong magmu mukmok dito at patuloy na magsisi. Wala na rin naman na akong magagawa para ibahin kung ano man ang naganap na. All I can do is move one and continue life like how I am supposed to.

With or without him...

I guess this is what you call a "Silent Love". At sa tingin ko, ito nalang ang magagawa ko para sakanya. Ang tingnan sya sa malayo. Ang maging masaya para sakanya kahit na hindi ako ang nagpapasaya sakanya. Ang pagmasdan syang patuloy na mabuhay the way he wanted. Ang makita syang maayos ang kalagayan at ligtas.

Ang malamang, once upon a time in my life, I was in love with a guy named Rafael.

  

   

   

   

  

  

If only I can talk to you right now, I would tell you I love you...

Xoxo, Mole.