If Maxon Picked Kriss

Chapter 1

America's POV:
2 Years Ago

"Over these few months, I have come to know a lot about these women. I have formed connections with them that I hope will last them after the selection. However, now that we are brought to the final two young ladies it is crucial that I decide which one will serve the best purpose as my other half, a loyal woman, and your future queen. With that I have my decision."

Maxon finishes his speech and gets down on one knee. Kriss and I are beside Maxon on different sides. He glances my way. In hatred or regret I couldn't say. He then turns to Kriss.

"Kriss Ambers you have supported me in moments of need. You have stood by my side, had the country's best interest at all times, and I know you will help shape me to become a great king of Illea. I know you will rule with your heart and bring this country to happiness with your rule." Maxon pauses to breathe and then says while smiling,

"Kriss Ambers will you do the honors of marrying me?"

I sat there motionless. I can't believe he actually  did it. This is really the end. For some reason it never sank in. Oh god. What have I done. I love him. I never wanted to lose him.

My eyes start to tear up but I don't let them fall. I can't. Not here. I need to put on a good face. That was his one wish.

"Yes! Oh my gosh yes! I love you!" Kriss exclaims pulling Maxon's arms, picking him back up from kneeling on the ground.

I stand there in angst. How does this even happen. I can't even comprehending what I'm losing until everyone is out of the room. And yet, there I am still standing there. Once everyone is finally gone I really can actually comprehend what's happening:
No more going to the gardens and talking.
No more having to worry about getting his father to tolerate me.
No more silly fights.
No more comforting after rebel attacks.
That's all gone.
Even the fights we had. Even the anger I held. I would never get that back. I never got to cherish it. I never stopped and thought of how much he truly meant and now he's gone. We're gone.

I don't know how much time past. I barely remember everyone leaving the room. The only thing that pulled me out of this daze was the lights in the room turning off. I guess that so much time passed that I had missed the rest of the evening.

Another thing I failed to register was the fact that I was on the floor. And my eyes burned from all the crying I had done. Due to the position on the floor I was in with my legs to the side and hands pressed against the floor, my hands were red.

This is embarrassing. I don't know how to get to my room. I don't want anyone to see me. A loser.

I finally manage to get up, leave the room, and make it back to my own room on my own. When I get there the room is empty. I guess my maids had waited long enough and decided to get me tomorrow. Or maybe they're coming back. Either way I'm too tired to care. My head is throbbing and my eyes just want to close.

My bag is already packed with all my things. I know I need to leave tonight. I don't want to leave tomorrow and have to suffer thinking about everything I lost again. I grab a pen and paper and I start to write:

Dear, Anne, Mary and Lucy,
I have decided to leave tonight because I don't think it would be the best for me to stay another night right now. But I wanted to thank you so much for everything you've ever done for me. You have been the best company for me to talk to and interact here and I really will miss you all. You have really made me so happy and I am forever grateful to have had you as my maids and as friends. I'm sorry I couldn't have told you in person to say goodbye. Hopefully some day we can meet up again.
Please stay safe here and please be careful with rebel attacks.
Love,

America

I head to the nearest guard outside my door and hand them the letter to deliver to my maids. When I get back in I change my clothes into pants and a shirt and I take a look at myself in the mirror.

For a second I was taken aback. I look awful. My face is black from all the mascara that's running. My eyes have terrible bags under them. I look like I passed out or something.
I wipe my face to get it as decent as I can and then I head out of the bathroom and grab my bags to head out.

I walk to the front of the castle. The night sky is pitch black. I forgot to check the time when I got to my room. Not that it would make a difference because either way I'm leaving tonight.

Once I make it to the front gate there is multiple guards patrolling the gates. I approach the one nearest to me.

"Hello officer..." I look at his badge.
"McAdam. I would like to leave the gates to head to a bus station." I finish awaiting his answer.

"Are you sure Lady America? It's almost midnight and it might be dangerous walking alone. We can call a car that can take you wherever you want to go."

He seemed nervous. Or like he would get in trouble if something happened to me if I left like this. I would take the car but for some reason something in me pushed to say no. I felt an urge to go on my own. I just needed to be in control. Of something.

"Yes I'm sure. I know it's dangerous out there. I'll be alright it's barely half a mile to a bus stop. Thank you for your concern." I say and he signals the other guards to open the gate.
I start to head out and then he says,
"Are you sure you don't want any guards to walk with you to the bus stop?"
I ponder the question and then answer, "No I'm okay thank you for your help."
And I'm on my way.

❤️❤️❤️

There's nobody on the streets to the bus stop. I guess that's a good sign. No people to worry about. The street lights give off just enough light I can see the signs guiding me to the bus stop.

I make it to the bus stop and I see one lady on the street. Guessing by her lack of clothes she's homeless. And she's most likely a 7. I couldn't imagine what she's having to go through. I think of anything I could give her that I have on me. I don't have any food but luckily I have a jacket in my bag, and it's cold outside. I unzip my bag and find the jacket. I walk up to her and hand it to her. She smiles and thanks me then says,

"I rooted for you." I know that she meant it in the best way but honestly it stung.I don't understand where these emotions are coming from.

It felt like the whole selection I didn't care what he did or if he picked me. I kept waiting for him to send me home or to give me a reason to not want the crown. But now with everything we went through I want him so much more. I took him for granted. And now he's gone.

"Me too." I say with tears in my eyes again.

The bus comes a short while after. I wave to the lady goodbye and I'm on my way. Only problem is I don't know where.