I am on the worst period ever, this episode was written in blood, sweat and A LOT of tears. Appreciate me, I'm awesome.
"I don't know what you're talking about and I'm not talking to you. leave me alone" I yell coldly to get away from the situation. Everybody gets up and smells the same as Erick. "Smells like-" "blood" Richard says. "Azul?" Joel asks. "I don't know what you're talking about, leave me alone" I say and start to walk away. Erick grabs my arms tightly and a scream left my mouth.
Shit
"are you hurt?" he asks. "No! I don't know what you're talking about just leave me alone!" I cry "She just got her period!!" Tef yells. "did you?" Erick asks "yes. The smell is from my period" I say he looks at me and let go of my arm. I go up to the bedroom and my hands start to drip blood. "shit" I murmur and open my drawer to get some peds to stop the blood.
I feel dizzy and I fall to the ground.
"you idiot. Do it again and I'll kill you my self!" I hear a familiar voice. I slowly open my eyes, it is Mar. "Good morning sister that I thought that's smart" she says and slaps me. "AOW! What the fuck was that for?" I yell. "that is for self-harming. YOU IDIOT! The big boss wants to kill you anyway so you decide to join me yourself?" she yells "stop yelling, please, my head hurts like a bitch" I say and throw myself back on the ground.
"you probably got hurt when you fell" she says "fell from where?" I ask "just follow me" she says and sighs.
I get up and walk after her.
"what do you see?" she asks. I stand in front of a huge flower-filled. "a flower-filled?" I say "no, you idiot. What do you really see?" she says. I concentrate and try to figure out what am I supposed to see.
"Momma! Catch me!" the little boy runs away and suddenly I see myself, chasing him. "I got you!!" future me screams. "And I got YOU!" I see Erick grabs future me. "But nobody caught me yet!!" the little girl screams and laughs as she runs "What is that?" I ask Mar. "its a possibility" "what do you mean? I'm gonna have kids with Erick?" I ask. " it's possible. But not sure." she says "why not?" I say and she looks at me smiling. "you want him? To have your children?" she asks "i- don't know..." I respond "its a possibility sis. If you won't mess things up with him." she says "what do you mean?" I ask and she turns around and walks away.
"Momma! Daddy is faster then you" the little boy pulls future me (maybe) and we start to run together.
I look at Erick. He looks so happy. I step closer and closer to him, just to see up close... I am not gonna harm them or anything am I?
Erick runs after the little girl and catches her " I got you" he says gently. I look at him and couldn't help it but stare. "can I help you?" he looks up at me and smiles "oh- y-you can see me" I stutter "yes, why wouldn't I see you?" he asks and laughs "i- I don't know" I murmur. I point at my future self " um... She is your-" "wife. Her name is Azul. She's amazing isn't she?" he says. "you don't even recognize me.." I murmur under my breath. "of course he doesn't. He can't see you for you, he sees you as a different person with a different face and body." Mar appears behind me.
"can't they see you too?" I ask "no" she says "why?, you're here like me" I say "yes, I'm here. But I'm part of your mind when they're part of you or options for the future." she explains.
"Do you love her Erick?" I ask "Yes. More then I could ever explain in words" he says and hugs his daughter, I mean our daughter- I mean my future- ughhh never mind. "wait, how do you know my name?" he asks. "I- We went to school together once, we'll, it was nice talking to you. Have a nice day, bye" I say and walk away.
"whats next Mar? What else do you got to show me to prove to me I'm going insane?" I yell. " I showed you what can happen if you won't screw it up. Now it's your job, to make it happen because we both know you want it." she says "I don't! I don't know what are you talking about." I deny "COME ON! You're insulting me by thinking I buy this 'I don't give a shit about him' act. You can take it, and shove it up your ass." she says "HEY! RUDE!" I yell.
"you love him. A lot. More then you can explain, maybe even more then you can contain. all the fight and the struggles, always end up right BECAUSE you care. You want his touch, you are dying to kiss him just like that and you are dying to give him your virginity. And it's not because you're stuck with him, it's because you may not admit it but you love him" She says "so now, wake up, and do what's right sister, tell him what you did, accept whatever's gonna happen, and make it right, you still got time" she says and hugs me "got time before what?" I ask "before the big boss gonna find out that he didn't take your virginity that day, because I can show you a future option for that as well, and it doesn't end up with a family running in a flower-filled." she says. "so what do you want me to do?" I say. I was crying without even noticing. "wake up, and give it him. You don't want anyone else anyway..." she says.
She's telling the truth. I want to give him my virginity but too scared to do it. I am tough on people sometimes, especially Erick... And he is the sweetest to me, when he was on heat I wasn't mad because he wanted to basically rape me, I was mad because it was the first time he ever acted tough on me like that. I couldn't accept it...
"Okay I get it, what now?" I ask "now you need to walk up" she says "Okay but- I wasn't asleep" I say.
"Azul! You're up!" Erick jumps off the chair and runs to hold my hand "what happened?" he asks "I was b-" I start and look at my hands, no blood. Looks like Mar did the Job for me. " I wasn't feeling well. Sorry I scared you" I say " it's okay." he says and hugs me. " I cannot hide the fact that I really really love you okay? I can't lose you..." he says "you love me?" I ask " I do. Way more then you think..." he says. "Listen, I've been an asshole in the past few days. I was in mood swings like a total bitch and I'm sorry" I say " I get it. Really, I do. I still really love you" he says and kisses me.
"Erick?" I stop the kiss and look at him. Si? Princesa?" he says.
"I'm ready"
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