[Tordtom stories I stopped working on]

Baby Making Time

Family au
I wanted to have fun creating some strange biology for Tom involving some botany.
---

Tom woke up one day to see that his hair had gotten an inch longer, he gave his hair a gentle tug and felt the roots of his hair had already settled. His skin had become rough and calloused; it was time.

Tord was in the living room, watching 'the children', it was about to get to an interesting part when Tom suddenly blocked the television.

"Tord?"

Tom fiddled with his thumbs before sitting down beside Tord and leaning against him, Tord jolted at the spike the pricked his skin, he looked back at Tom with a gentle look despite the pain,

"what's wrong?"
"what do you feel about having kids?"

Tord could feel his heart beat faster, a smile appeared on his face, he grabbed both of Tom's shoulders and pulled him into a hug.

"yes! Yes! Fucking Yes! Are we finally going to adopt?"
"it's not through adoption, we're getting a child, biologically..."

Tord's smile didn't falter, he could feel tears prick at the corner of his eyes as he shook Tom multiple times in excitement before he was stopped.

"so how are we going to do this?"
"easy, let's have sex with a condom on"

+

Tom was pinned against the bed, with his legs on top of Tord's shoulders,

"is this going to work? Don't you need to-"
"Well there is some other way but I don't think you'll be comfortable comfortable with the alternative method"
"what is it?"

---

It was definitely weird to be standing butt naked in your backyard while watching your boyfriend saw off his hair.

"it's cold"
"are you hard yet?"
"I guess but I still don't know why we're doing this in the middle of the night"

Blood started to drip from Tom's head while his hand held his hair up high, he pointed towards the empty plant pot and asked Tord to bring it forward.

Tom planted his hair and grabbed the pot from Tord's hands.

"now what?"
"cum into the pot"
"what!?"
"go on, jerk off or do you want me to do it for you?"

Tord lined his cock towards Tom's hair and started jerking off slowly,

"this is really weird"
"we've been together for 9 years, for the span of this marriage I've seen you jerk off multiple times"
"no its not that, it's more of jerking into a plant with your spouse's hair while they bleed from the head"

Tord finally felt himself release and coat the pot with his semen. Tom held the pot close to his chest and placed it near the doorstep.

"I'm going to take a shower, wanna join Tord?"
---

The weird abomination of a plant is starting to take a toll on Tom. Tord's the first one to notice this and its becoming more peculiar each day.

Of course the plant, has been given a name of Torm and they have been stealing most of Tom's attention.

Tom could be seen singing to it,  watching the television with it and checking every night to see if it 'moved'.

The hair gradually fanned out as a small bulb appeared in the middle. Tom would spend hours talking to it about stuff.

Four months have passed and Tom is acting more weird.

"Tom what is that?"
"it's a corn dog in pancake batter, I'm going to deep fry this bad boy"
"noo"

Tord pulled Tom away from the stove and and turned off the fire, he carried Tom to the bedroom and dropped him on the bed.

"Tord I'm hungry, what are you doing?"
"how is this even possible? The baby is not even in you? How are your hormones this jacked?"

Tom just coyly smiled and rolled around in the bed giggling, completely ignoring whatever Tord said.

"why are you laughing?"
"I just can't believe you are questioning that, I mean look at my eyes do you think there's anything normal with me?"
"I think you're very normal, you're just weird but I love you for that"

Tom pulled Tord to a hug and wrapped his arms and legs around him, he suddenly jumped off to grab Torm.

"do you want to see the baby?"
"sure"

Tom grabbed Torm and moved some of the leaves to reveal a small person as big as Tord's hands.

"holy shit, there's a person"

---

After five more months, it was time, Tom held a pair of scissors while Tord held the wool blanket in his hands.

Tom gently cut the stem connecting Torm to the plant and let out a small cry, Tord caught the baby in the blanket and held it close.

Tom walked closer and admired the baby as well.
---

"and that's how you were born! Isn't that great?"
"what the fuck"

Tom covered his mouth in shock while Tord let out a wheeze in the background.

---

Pineapples are very hard to grow.