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Karma

Louis' p.o.v.

I laid there as stiff as a wooden board all night. Levi's arms stayed wrapped around me keeping me trapped in the hell that was his presence. The only thing I had keeping me from complete insanity was the piece of heaven who slept peacefully in my arms. I held him like it was my only way to live. I tried so hard to focus on just Harry. I ran my hands in his delicate curls while he slept. His hair was soft and smelled of lavender and vanilla. It was like home, and it would've been like home had I not been imprisoned by the man behind me. I spent all night in my thoughts bouncing back and forth between the heaven and hell I was in; my own personal purgatory.

The sun slowly began to fill my bedroom. I was exhausted emotionally and physically at this point. I looked at my clock which read 5:34 and sighed. I wanted nothing more than to get up and shower away all of Levi's touch that felt stained on my skin. I felt so small in this moment. I know I'm not that big of a person but as a person I have a rather large presence, but while Levi had his arms keeping me there it felt as though he was taking away ever ounce of me.

I was scared to move and wake either of the people in my bed. I wanted to crawl out of my skin, I felt so gross. I couldn't stand it any longer so I risked waking both of them. I very timidly took my trembling hands that were once wrapped around Harry and lightly place them on Levi's arms. I slowly began to move his arms from my body. My breathing was shallow from the fear that was coursing through me. Don't wake up. Please don't wake up. I begged in my head.

I had successfully gotten one arm off of me after about 30 minutes of trying to summon the courage to execute my escape. I let out a small sigh of relief feeling a taste of freedom. I went to his other arm and was back to square one. I spent just as long gaining the courage again before I took a deep breathe and decided I'd move his arm on three. One... Two... Three... I moved his arm and waited. I laid there terrified he would wake up. I laid in the same spot without moving a muscle for the longest 15 minutes of my life. To my relief, he was still sleeping even though I had moved him. I was free.

I allowed myself time to soak in the freedom and recover from the tension I had from moving his arms. I slowly sat up and looked over at Harry. My full attention was finally allowed to be on him. Seeing him in such a peaceful state made me finally understand what people meant when they said that a person felt like home, because right now, Harry felt like home. He was kind, gentle, and had a warmth to him that was sweeter than the golden rays of sun that draped across my room. Harry looked so beautiful. He was practically glowing, his hair rested delicately behind him in a beautiful work of art made of nothing but silky curls, his jaw was extremely defined, yet his face was still soft. Harry was a like a gift handmade by a God. He was a masterpiece.

I glanced over at the clock again and saw it was already a few minutes past 7. I ran my hands through my hair stealing one last look of Harry before I decided I should go shower. I slowly began to inch my way off the bed until I felt a hand take ahold of my wrist. To say I panicked would be an understatement. I instantly teared up, shaking, and hyperventilating. I didn't want to be touched or imprisoned anymore this weekend.

"I-I'm s-s-sorry." I quickly stuttered out to Levi. I was met with the softest voice in the world.

"Lou? Hey, are you okay?" Harry spoke in a whisper. He quickly sat up and let go of my wrist before wrapping me in a tight hug.

I knew I was safe because Levi wasn't awake but I was still having a hard time handling the panic I was in. Harry sat there hugging me tight telling me I'm okay. I brought myself together and wiped my eyes quickly pulling away slowly from Harry's embrace. He gave me a gentle look that was full of concern.

"Sorry I just had a nightmare and when you touched my arm I thought it wasn't a nightmare for a second." I didn't completely lie. I was in a nightmare it just wasn't induced by sleeping. I did think it was happening again when Harry touched me, I just couldn't tell him that because I didn't want to seem like I hated his friend. I had made things hard enough on Harry I didn't need to make it worse by telling him about Levi. Plus, why would he believe me? I cheated on my girlfriend, I still need to build up trust with him. Although we had a great night together last night, Harry and I were still on a fine line and I was not going to do anything to make that worse.

"Oh I'm so sorry, I was just trying to get you to come back to holding me." His voice was delicate and I could tell he felt bad. My heart warmed with his words. He just wanted me to hold him again. I smiled sweetly at him. He has nothing to feel bad for.

"Hey it's okay. You had no idea I had a nightmare." I ruffled my hands through his hair which was met with a giggle and a big smile. I loved the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled. Everything about this boy was soft. "I'm going to just shower first and then I'll be back okay?" He nodded and smiled blushing. I got up out of bed stretching headed towards the bathroom.

"Lou?" Harry shyly attempted to get my attention before I reached the bathroom door. I turned around giving him my full attention. "Uh I'm kinda cold and I was uh wondering if I could steal your sweatshirt for now?" He smiled blushing.

I couldn't believe he wanted my sweatshirt. He was so shy asking too which just added to how cute it was. I quickly took off the big sweatshirt I was in and carefully threw it his way. He put it on with a big smile looking back at me. He blushed looking at my bare chest which made me giggle a little. Harry then spoke.

"I don't want to send mixed signals so I want you to know, I'm still upset with everything, but I am taking a liking to this Louis I'm getting to know. I still need time though. I just want to make sure I communicate with you." He told me. I appreciated his honesty with me. It was really admirable that he was so open.

"I totally understand. You deserve all the time you need. I want you to know I in no way expect you to forgive fully anytime soon or at all if that's what you need, and I don't want you to put any pressure on yourself about forgiving me. Please take all the time you need." I told him. He smiled warmly.

"Thank you Lou. Now go shower so you can get your ass back in bed." He giggled. I laughed a little too before entering the bathroom.

The moment I stepped foot in the shower, all the emotions I had built up from the Levi situation rushed through me. Every inch of my skin that had been touched by him felt like it was burning. The panic became present once again as I grabbed a loofa pouring soap on it. I frantically scrubbed at the burning skin hoping if I scrubbed enough it would eventually make the feeling go away. My skin was red and raw from how harsh I was trying to get rid of his touch. It didn't work. I sat on the floor of my shower pulling my knees up to my chest. As the water was cascading down my back and the tears down my face, I had to come to accept that I was going to be seeing a lot more of Levi. Maybe Levi was my karma for what I had done to Harry and Eleanor, and let me tell you, karma's a bitch.

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a/n: hi lovelies! i hope you all are well! i wanna give you all a little space to rant about levi if you need it so please share all the anger you have because he's the worst! how are you guys liking the story so far? we have a lot more to go! let me know your thoughts! if you can please vote, comments, and share! thank you for reading and thank you for supporting me! sending all my love!
~ruth ♡